Role reversal

Yesterday, for Adol psych lecture, we covered 'the family', focusing on the relationship between the parents and the developing adolescent. There was this part on how the family is never stagnant, rather its dynamic. As the adol changes, the parents change as well. The relationship becomes one that is more horizontal than vertical. I like that idea. You know how top-down parents are when theyre children are still young..but gradually, it smoothens into a horizintal line..and then in some sense, vertical again, this time with the children holding on to the higher end of the line. Its a beautiful metaphor. Poignant. You realise there's a family life cycle. The young child from being dependant, slowly becomes the caregiver, before becoming dependant (perhaps in certain aspects) again.

I see this happening in my family already. The change. Its so different now. My opinion matters. My point of views hold water. My assistance is needed..and valued.
The sombre realisation that my parents are not so young anymore hit me hard this morning.
My dad was attacked by a plant last night (long story). We rushed down to the A&E and thankfully, his right cornea suffered only a superficial scratch which would heal soon. But my gosh, was i worried. I was worried that it could be internally caused. You never know if a vein/artery had ruptured and a minor stroke had happened since more often than not, people dont usually know they've suffered from a stroke/heart attack until much later. So Im really relieved.

Nevertheless, back to my point on role reversal. Essentially, had I not been there with my parents, their getting around the hospital would have been difficult. After all, in hospitals, you have to move from one waiting area to another etc, etc and you most likely have to rely on sign boards to navigate yourself. Futhermore, my dad already has his eye problem, my mom was also in a daze and her eyesight, though she tries to hide it, is deteriorating....
Im just thankful today is my free day. I want to be with my parents, my family, if when things like this happen.

You know, my parents (most parents actually) have put in so much for me, for my siblings. The least I can do is to be there for them as how they have been here for me.

Role reversal? Its nothing new, really. Its natural. The cycle of life.

What a monday Tuesday it is today.

I cant stand feeling stupid.

Yes, occasionally its liberating to act stupid since acting stupid momentarily allows you to let go the responsibility of knowing things. But to feel stupid is a different thing.
Simply because it is personally insulting.

It's enough that class starts at 8am and i have to drag myself out of bed at 530am and to school bleary eyed. But to embarrass myself at such an early hour is too much lah. Bio psych tutorial sure dampened my mood.

For those unfamiliar with Bio psych tutorials, here's a sum up. For tutorial sessions, everyone is broken up into groups. Each tutorial session is run like a 'game' show (roll eyes) where the presenting group poses a number of questions to the other groups bla bla bla. So each week, 2 chapters would be covered effciently and in a 'fun' manner. Fine. Innovative lah. Thing is, you have to read the two chaps before every tutorial or your group would end up stumped. Which is great cos then it ensures that you actually do read your text and all.

Oh come on. Who reads the textbook dutifully? I would take an average of four hours to finish one chapter! Plus, considering I havent read the previous chapters properly (which are the foundation for the subsequent chaps), understanding the current ones would be hard...and so you can see where this is heading.

I am digging myself deeper into the "oh no, what is going on?" danger pit for bio psych.

Argh. So of course i couldnt answer the bleeping questions satisfactorily. NO excuses for myself. purely my fault. Worse, none of my groupmates were prepared. So when it came to our group to answer the questions, silence silence silence.

If any of you know me well enough, i cannot stand silence. I just feel so freaking uneasy if im targeted a question and i dont say anything. I just have to say something. And so i did. Considering no one in my group wanted to say anything I had to say something.

And then the embarassment. I started babbling, obviously showing the whole wide world i wasnt prepared. I sounded purely bimbotic i hated myself. I kept thinking "oh come on farah, please dont make yourself look stupid...in front of your classmates its ok..but not your lecturer! "

SIGH.

Nevermind, in a way, i'm glad this happened because im gonna make bloody sure that im prepared for bio tuts from now on.

I need to redeem myself for myself.

ZeeeeZeeeZeeeee...DRRRRR....

My bathroom is being renovated as I type this. The drilling was remarkably tolerable till a few seconds ago. I will remain zen-like. I will remain zen-like. I will remain zen-like.

What on earth is 'zen' anyway?

I have very good news to share.

MY DADDY LIKES MY BOYFRIEND!

My Dad didnt explicitly say so but I can feel that he does. The way he remembers things about the Bf (considering that he doesnt seem to remember much about any of my other friends)..But you know what really made my day? It was when my dad said at the dinner table the evening after najib came that he's not worried about me. That I can take care of myself and I know what Im doing. (To which i beamed and then he added 'i hope so') :) You can say that pretty much all my life, Ive been waiting to hear him say that.

Yay. That dinner on friday was great. My dad got to know him more and nudgie got to see what a buka puasa session with my family is like.

I like this. I like how life (outside school) is going so far. Alhamdulillah.

Healthy progress

Its mid mid-sem break and I think Im more productive this mid-sem break than previous sems. Or so I hope. But im satisfied so far.

Progressing steadily in my lab in applied psych project. Which is great. I think i have fantastic group members :) So at least Im glad that this 70% project will be in good hands.

I have finished reading all the chaps covered so far for gen bio. Yes, gloat gloat gloat. But im proud of myself. And know what? The Krebs cycle isnt so hard what. Its understandable. So why do all those post A level bio peeps keep giving me the creeps by shuderring when I mention it? Its quite interesting too. Sigh. Hope im not being to cocky though. Reading and understanding is one thing. Doing well is another. I have a nagging suspicion that the finals' MCQs are gonna be way tricky. Still, i'll be ready and no way am i gonna S/U this mod :)

Been reading arabic too and alhamdulillah, i think i am improving :)

Ok, so im still deciding which topic to do for my eva acad arg mod's position paper. Should I write on 'entrapment' or 'legalising prostitution'?

Then, theres the fact that Ive totally neglected bio psych and adol psych. Im struggling with the former btw. Hopefully not for long.

Oh gosh. I dont think im that satisfied with my mid-sem break after all. ARGH.

Another 4 days to go...(but then i'll be working on my lab report...)

BLIMEY.

breathe farah breathe..

Stuff to do

BY this week:-

1) Gen bio lab assignment 3
2) Lab in health report 2
3) Gem 1008 critique
4) Gem 1008 position paper research
5) Lab in health project research

a little 'off time'

I cant exactly remember what i was dreaming about in my sleep but i vaguely remember heading to the swimming pool in one segment of it while in another segment of my dream I was speaking French (really badly, i must add) to some people. And in another segment someone was after us? 'Us' who? I have no idea.

Ive been sleeping too much. I cant seem to get myself out of bed. Take today for instance. I woke up at 5am to sahur but all i could do was to drink water with half open eyes (thankfully, i always put a bottle of water by my bed) and i went back to sleep. Woke up at 8am but then i went back to sleep. Woke up at 9.15am but went back to sleep. Woke up at 10am....and i had to force myself to sit up.

Im obviously lacking motivation to wake up.

And my sleep-wake cycle has wrongly stabilised after thurs. Im sleeping 10 hours a day now. Gosh, this is unhealthy.

Slacked on saturday and sunday but I deserve it lah.

Went to ECP on sat for a morn run with nudgie, tuition (her finals are in 2 WEEKS TIME!!! argh), then had lunch with nudgie and his sister (think the sister is warming up to me :) ) and later went to my aunts place for some prayer thing for my grandma (cant believe its almost a year already since she left).

Sunday was slacking around even though I was scheduled to study. Went shopping with sister and heh, I bought myself a pair of shoes. I fell in love with it at first sight. Ive been looking for that kind of shoe for a very long time. Its black, velvet, pointy and flat.

Anyhoos, my dad has invited nudgie over on friday for dinner. I dont know whether to feel excited or anxious.

Its nearly mid-day now and im still deciding which subject I should study. I guess I'll just open my cupboard and grab whichever book that calls out to me. No point studying something Im not in the mood for. It is the break after all :)

Break.

Sleep deprived but satisfied.

Handed in the paper finally.

Breather for now.

Happy.

Extracted DNA just now :) Cool stuff :)

Waiting for a ride home. I think its best that the public be kept safely away from me.

Hmm, everyone around me is so happy :) So nice.

Kweeting and sharon very noisy. "Now then you know", says Kweeting. "Ha Ha Ha", says sharon :)

Hmm...Im.....happy :)

light at the end of the tunnel

When you really begin to question yourself about whether God has decided to not help you because He's helped you too much and you havent been that much of a grateful person.

When you feel that something so worldly and inconsequential in the larger scheme of things shouldn't get to you but alas, it did.

When you think what a rotten person you are inside and wonder if God can forgive you and still loves you.

When you begin the question the way things are and why and then feel downright guilty about it.

When you just want to sleep cos thats where you feel happiest and care-free.

The blues.

But then, someone comes and lends a listening ear and offer kind words of advice and to remind you of what is. That's when all darkness dissipates and a rush of hope illuminates and pierces through the abyss you've drowned yourself in.

You realise and remember(as you always did, deep in your heart), that God will always be with you. God is forgiving. God is wise. God is loving.
God will always help if you ask Him to. All you got to do is to believe.

Then everything will truly be alright.

Insya-Allah.

Yank me hair out..GARGH!

Did not feel like getting out of bed today at all. I just wanted to sleep and forget about everything else. Call it my form of escapism.

How? HOW?

Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, Breathe out.

The inertia to start yet again on yet another one, barely having the time to recover from the previous one.

Assignment after assignment after assignment after assignment...

I want term break to come. I need it to come. COME!!

gargh

What else is due (new)?

Item Status

1. Bio psych termpaper Done
2. Eva acad arg assignment Due Fri 15/9
3. Gen Bio lab assignment Due Tues 19/9 (dateline still to be confirmed)
4. Lab in app psych report 1 Due Wed 20/9
5. Adol psych critique Due Fri 22/9

Breathe.

Inspirational

I have often dreamed, of a far off place
Where a hero's welcome, would be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer, when they see my face
And a voice keeps saying, this is where I'm meant to be
I'll be there someday, I can go the distance
I will find my way, if I can be strong
I know ev'ry mile, will be worth my while
When I go the distance, I'll be right where I belong

Down an unknown road, to embrace my fate
Though that road may wander, it will lead me to you
And a thousand years, would be worth the wait
It might take a lifetime, but somehow I'll see it through
And I won't look back, I can go the distance
And I'll stay on track, no, I won't accept defeat
It's an uphill slope, but I won't lose hope
Till I go the distance, and my journey is complete

But to look beyond the glory is the hardest part
For a hero's strength is measured by his heart
Like a shooting star, I will go the distance
I will search the world, I will face its' harms
I don't care how far, I can go the distance
Till I find my hero's welcome, waiting in your arms
I will search the world, I will face its harms
Till I find my hero's welcome, waiting in your arms

-Go the Distance, Michael Bolton

Mellow

Something is physically wrong with me.
My legs are stiff and heavier than usual while my head is light. I seem to somehow sway to the left when i stand up and if I lie down and close my eyes, I feel like I'm being sucked into a whirpool.

I am procrastinating.
I dont feel like starting on my term paper anytime soon but I know I must. I want to enjoy writing it up. I mean contrary to what others may feel, I enjoy the researching bit. The sense of purpose while listening to music I havent heard in ages and just bobbing my head is great but when it comes to actually consolidating everything you've found and churning out a comprehensive and sensible paper is the hardest bit. The adrenalin knowing that Im almost done gets me too excited that I just cant sit still to think.

I'm also feeling torn.
Two of my friends are celebrating their birthday in tomorrow. One of them's flying off soon and her birthday's in Oct while the other one has hers next week but both are having it tomorrow.
Question is, how does farah fly from clementi to pasir ris then to bugis (presumably) then head back to tamp all in 5 hours? Heck, I'll make it for both. These two girls are my friends and I want to be present at their 21st birthday celebration.

Tomorrow would also be our 15th month together. I know its silly but since we dont hang out much, making the effort to 'celebrate' each month is something that we share. The best thing about this relationship, however, is that we're flexible. (or rather, he is more than I am and should be) I mean, we both know that we have our own lives and circle of friends. So thank you for everything and for all the support you've given me in anything that I do. Even the littlest things you do for me means so much to me. And you've given me a lot.

Anyway, Im proud of myself for mustering enough gut yesterday as I went up to a certain lecturer. I am anticipating (and praying for) a favourable outcome :)

Also, a conversation I had a few days ago with a friend has been ringing in my head. I may have unintensionally arrived at a response without much thought. He asked if I were given a chance to work with a bunch of people for a project, would I join the people who have gotten 'A's or would I prefer to work with others (ie im assuming non A students)?

I immedietly responded that I would join the A group people. I now regret my answer and my reason.
I had mentioned that working with those A graders would give me the sense of security that these people are not slackers which I based on the assumption that grades are reflective of a person's interest and dedication to his/her work.

I now retract what I say because I realise and know that my reason is flawed.
Experience has showed me that grades are fluctuate. And I was wrong. I have worked my butt off for something before and was extremely passionate about it but I didnt score as well as others. To think that someone else would not want me in their group because of that bad grade and hence on that ill-conceived premise (which i had regrettably made) riles me. Besides, I do know of people who are not hardworking or as interested in work but who nonetheless managed to get As.

So my point is that if I have to choose groupmates, I would rather work with amicable people with positive work attitude. It doesnt matter what their previous grades may be. If I can work with people who share similar interests and working styles, Ill work with them for sure.

I guess we've been raised to think that grades (and therefore achievement) maketh the person. While it may be true to some, it could also be untrue. The relative in this matter, is the person, the key which is oft overlooked.

So having thought through the question, I humbly regret and am deeply ashamed at my rash answer previously.

How about you? Whoever is reading my blog? Given a situation where you must choose between amicable A graders and amicable others with whom you've worked with both groups of people before which would you choose?

eye

Doesnt the word the two 'e's in the word 'eye' look like eyes? With the 'y' as the nose?

My student's mom asked me if im 'senang' (prosperous) because ive gained weight.

....

eye

Ive formulated a few hypotheses. Namely, there is a correlation between weight gain and academic achievement (moderated or is it mediated (darn, i get confused btw the two) by eating behaviour). And, there is a correlation between liking a subject and doing well in it. Note, correlation doesnt mean its causal and of course, while the latter could be bidirectional, i dont see how the first can be. But you never know huh?

....

eye

Wonder why my tagboard hasnt been as 'happening' as it used to be before i removed it. Why ah?

eye

Blank.

Heh, did you feel like you were being stared at by 'eye's throughout this post?

Gosh. Im funny. :)

eye

School and stuff.

I may have been subconsciously over-ambitious this semester. Expectation wise. And i've only realised this yesterday evening as I wondered why i was feeling so stressed out even though its just the 3rd week of school.

I am taxing myself too much. Oh please, farah, you were never the sort of student to read the relevant chapters before any lecture. And because you thought you were always on the ball, you suddenly realise that being 3 chapters behind in almost every module was enough to just want to sleep and get away from everything.
Escapism beckoned till last evening.

So there, who cares if im chapters behind in my readings? who cares if im not that on the ball? Im only human. So why the sudden revelation? Cos as of yesterday, i realise that instead of worrying on how im gonna read the previous chaps and next week chapts within this week, i should focus on the task(s) at hand.

Term papers.

I have one due on the 12th and another soon after. So why not, instead focus on what i gotta do now? I'll have plenty of time to catch up. Perhaps as i work on these papers, i'll also go through those readings(although i dont really think so but the possibility is there). Then there's always reading week. There'll always be time.

No sweat. I can handle this. Baby steps is all i need to take. Rome wasnt built in a day.and neither will my cap.

Now i just need to be able to focus...and breathe. Just like I always say..breathe.

And many thanks to my friends at the swaps table. Will it still be called the swaps table? Anyways, i also realise that I need people around me. I was absolutely perplexed as to how i should approach my bio psych term paper till i approached the peeps there. Im so seriously blessed to know that I can always depend on someone there for company, advice, to engage in intellectual babble, information, bitching and well, anything basically! :) You guys are great :)


Aside: I ran for the first time at the SRC track on campus. Ran with cheryl and was hit by a bout of nostalgia triggered by familiar circumstances: Tuesday evenings(3rd period PE), cheryl, a certain big-head senior training on the track, a certain PE teacher coaching, and certain soccer players training. Deja Vu? Was i back at VJ? :)

Played netball and whee! i scored a goal to tie the match. :) But wah, darn tiring.

Big circle I ran

I really can’t believe it. The only time I ran around bedok reservoir before today was for cross country in sec 3. Heh, I completed it then. So the thing that worried me a little before I started the jog this morning was whether I could complete it again. After all, I was much fitter when I was 15. But wow. I did! I’m so happy. The company, the scorching sun and the will power to not NOT complete the run and shatter the memory of reservoir experience turned out to be very motivating.

4.3km non stop. ME! Hehe. Looks like the previous morn runs have been effective!

My other weekly exercise activities: Sunday swims and Tuesday netball.

To a fitter me! :)

Retail therapy

I was supposed to mug today but ended up spending the whole day with my mom. Went around from raffles place to harbour front and then back home. I accompanied her to settle some errands after which our spree took place.

I got myself:

A pair of jeans, lingerie, facial toner, 2 bags (oh wait, these i bought last night), other stuff, and food, food, food.

Im appalled with myself. Then again, I need the above stuff so there. Its not like im wasting money..I'll only be wasting IF i dont use them. So I WILL use them.

Shopping with mom is good cos heh, food is covered. And sometimes, moms do tend to be charitable, dont they? ;)

Oh yeah, mom and I decided to take bus 65 from harbour front cos we missed 10 and while the journey was far too long, it was nice to see my mom get excited while pointing out to me what used to be where and what she used to do..where she used stay and hang out, as the bus went by.

But seriously, i'll never take 65 back to tamp from harbour front again. Not if i can help it.

Merrier

So i went for the netball recre welcome tea and I felt old. Nearly everyone there except the comm members were freshies and they're all so friendly. :) Had an itch to join the comm which i had to suppress by reminding myself that Im a 3rd year and the only reason im joining netball is to sweat it out and know more people.

Then i saw weilan and sheena! hahah. so i wasnt the only third yr! Sheena's joining so yay! Made so many more friends...that heh, i cant remember their names! But they were amazed as to why im joining :)

Managed to pull in several ppl to come down to play. Kim, karina and pema! hahah! I didnt really expect them to show interest but they said yes almost instantly! Wow.

So i do have friends who wanna sweat it out with me :)

Off my laurels!

Im a bit disappointed with the state of my mental stamina. I became fatigue after reading 1.5 chapters of my gen bio text. And i have yet to touch on my bio psych, adol psych,eva aca arg and lab readings. Bah! Nevermind, slow and steady better than nothing.

Physically, Ive been going for saturday morning runs thanks to a certain somebody and Im really glad about that. I've also been looking around for a sport to join. I seriously feel like joining something which involves being in a team since face it, once i leave uni, what are the chances of me playing a sport in a team? Besides, ive already joined a society, a publication and now...a sport! :)

And the sport im deciding to engage is...netball recreational! I like the game. The exposure i got during sec sch pe lesson left an impression on me. I just never got the opp to actually join the cca cos well, i was darn intimidated by the girls. They were all so fit..and well, i dont know abt you but back in my sec sch, they were the 'popular' ones..or so i thought.

Anyhoos, tmr is the welcome tea. Im quite psyched for it except for the fact that it'll start at 6 and end at 9. I finish at 2 on tues so i'll have to wait 4 hours...and by the time i reach home, it'll be nearly 11. And i have sch on wed morn at 9!

But as what my nudgie says "its sports what. Expected to start and end late. And you must be committed".

Lets just see how long i can survive.

eye opener

Attended the dean's list ceremony in the evening and yeah, it was the standard stuff you'd expect from any ceremony. It isnt the worst that ive been to (think back to the draggy CC bursary awards back in pri/sec sch) although some of my friends have told me otherwise. Its nice to see who's there and all that i actually quite enjoyed myself considering the company (grace and liangcai..and nudgie..and food) and the entertainment (the a capella peeps are really good)

:) I enjoyed myself. Its not everyday you know.

...and then burning questions..

"who on earth are these people? How come ive never seen the psych ones before?"

"how on earth do you become top in psych when people take diff mods every sem?"

"how on earth does one qualify for top arts student for year 2 etc?"

"why do all the book prizes for psych students end up being sponsored by the spore prisons service"

I want more awards. Gimme gimme gimme! Please? I promise to work hard :)

Whee~

Organise

Finally, finally, finally, I feel my life is getting on track again.

I am not ashamed to admit that I am totally dependent on organisers. The past 2 weeks have been so messy because my previous nus diary did not cover the first two weeks of August. My goodness, how relieved I am to have the new nussu diary for 06/07 which I love. I love the layout. They have monthly AND daily planners, not to mention the academic calendar, a time table schedule and a map!

I cant help it. Ima sieve head. And have a penchant for planning. I need to know what to expect in the next few days, few months. I need to write my datelines somewhere. I need to jot down my appointments. I need to have order. I need to have direction. Thank goodness for organisers!

I have finally color coded my modules. I need to get new files and pens in various colors. I like to organise myself and Im dedicating this entire week for it! Why? cos organisers and organising now saves a lot of time in future. Not to mention memory space. And less anxiety cos i'll know what to expect.

I'm a control freak. :)

Also, thank GOD i finally have all my texts. I am way behind in readings and I cant wait to pry open my text and smell the crisp print scent. And Im pleased to have gotten myself 2 second hand books which looks as good as new.

Now all I need is a foldable table that i can set up when Im feeling studious.

Yay! Im finally feeling enthusiastic for school again.

1st Day

Okay, not as good a first day as I imagined it to be but I am amazed with my sheer determination not to let my day be ruined by....

1) Stuff

2) Getting caught in the rain while on my way to science when i just washed my jeans and was wearing my new jacket and shirt

3) Broke the straps of my left slipper while trudging up to LT32

4) Have to sign up for bio tut again cos of some admin prob

But no. I did not let them ruin my first day. Cos all in all, it was a great day :) Catching up with mel and cheryl which really really made my day :) Managed to sell my soci text book..and having a nice time with nudgie on my way home.

If there's one thing ive learnt time and time again is that things never always happen the way you expect them to. But then you know what? Maybe it wasnt meant to be as how you imagined it to be. Everything happens for a reason. And with every experience, be it joy or sadness, brings with it lessons you can learn and take away.

And today I learnt the value of optimism.

"Today will be a great day"

Psych me up!

Im quite satisfied. I managed to get all the modules I want without much hassle compared to previous semesters. Even managed to get a 3 day week again (if all goes well with tutorial balloting that is).

My only gripes are
1) I may have an 8am tutorial for Bio psych. But at least i know i wont be alone :) (yay mel!)
2) Gen Bio lect time has been changed so now i have no breaks in between lect. But that isnt the problem. The problem is getting myself over to science faculty in under 15 mins, at peak hour.

Anyways, my mods are....(drum rolls)

1) Biological Psychology
2) Adolescent Psychology
3) Lab in Applied Psychology (Lab in Health Psych)
4) General Biology
5) Evaluating Academic Arguments

Hope i'll be able to ace them :) So far, my mods all seem interesting so yay! :)

FIREWORKS!

Caught the fireworks yesterday. Amazing how crowded city hall was simply because everyone was cramming at the Esplanade cum areas thereabouts to catch the s'pore team's display of the fireworks festivals.

We managed to get a better view from along the expressway. (you know, those lanes you sometimes see people walking along as you drive by wondering why and how on earth they got there) heh, cars actually switched off their ignition and observed the 15 mins in awe. :) A night all drivers united against the traffic police with their illegal parking (i mean, they cant summon ALL the cars can they?)

In any case, happy national day everyone! Im glad to be born and bred here. So privileged we are as compared to a lot of other places. No war, no famine, no draught, no natural disasters, great food, great sanitation, great housing and people get along. What more can you ask for?

And yes yes, i now know that school starts next week. And i was just getting used to living the life of a bum.

A question

When on earth does school start exactly?

Laaa La laaa

Ok, dont judge me alright? And im no music expert.

I was dead bored home. So I decided to look up songs. Searched for shania twain on youtube. Found nice ones and then, found one which she sang with the backstreet boys. So then i decided to search for backstreet boys on youtube. To which i encountered tonnes of music videos. And i listened to the ones I know and my gosh. Memories came flooding back. They were really big back in our teen years and no one can deny that. Haha. Then bubblegum pop was phased out then in came those wannabe bands like blink182 and whatever. Then the 'real' bands that were at least decent to listen to like...i dont know..Creed or whatever..Then the angry teens like avril (who has tamed a little now, i feel. at least her songs arent so raw now. Got more depth)...then those dirty sleazy hip hop which is still ongoing and which i find myself bobbing my head to once in a while.

Popular music is always evolving dont you think?

So anyway, listening to backstreet boys after a long time is refreshing. Yes, the lyrics are lame and their music videos are too drama for their own good. But my gosh, they CAN sing what. So there. Im a bit angry cos i know of ppl who would diss boybands and denouce all boyband members as crap singers..which isnt true nor fair.

Ya. Okay. I have no idea why i bother to blog abt this. I sound like a rambling teen. See what music does to you? It brings you back to the time you first heard the song.

Darn it. I should have gone to their concert when they were here earlier this year.

Heh, but you know something really odd? It took me quite sometime to get used to the whole boyband thing when i was in sec sch. Like before sec 1, I was listening certain songs from the Scorpions, Bon Jovi (who was a hip rock dude then) Alphavile, Europe, Journey, Guns N Roses, Queen,Whitesnake,Meatloaf, Kansas (all of which were in slow rock compilation CDs my bro owned..haha) Bryan Adams, Richard Marx, Roxette..and of course the staple ballads of mariah carey and yes, yes, michael jackson.

Which was why i probably didnt quite fit in cos my friends back then were like eh? who?

Anyway, random thought: is it me or is there like effectively only one singer in the pussycat dolls?

Confused

I thought i planned my modules out like almost a month ago. Then I just realised that it isnt as feasible anymore to stick to it.

Shoots.

Im in search of modules. Need breadths/UEs. Any recommendations? Please comment.

Email Correspondances

NOTE: READ FROM BOTTOM-UP

Dear Ms XXX

I thank you for your assistance and have noted your suggestion. I do hope that my predicament can be looked into as I am sure that other students share my sentiments with regard to this matter.

Thank you once again.

With sincerest gratitude,
Farah

Dear Farah

We will look into the situation and see how we could help you. In the meantime, you may want to try bidding for PL3284_1 since it is only offered in Semester 1.

Regards
XXX (Ms)
Senior Administrative Officer
Department of Psychology

Dear Ms XXX,

Thank you for the clarification. However, I am gravely disheartened by this matter. You are implying that because of the 'system', I am unable to take both aspects of Lab in Applied Psychology.

As a student of this institution, I feel that I am entitled to the right to know why the two labs were bundled under one module to begin with. I feel that I should not have been disadvantaged because of the 'system'. I am interested in both aspects of applied psychology and am serious in pursuing this field in future. I feel that both labs would be highly beneficial to my studies now and for my post-graduate studies. Because of this 'system', I feel that it is unfair for me to have to choose between the two labs given that their content vary a great deal.

I am uncertain if you are the relevant party I should convey my grieviences to so I apologise if you are not the intended recepient. However, I truly appreciate if my email could be forwarded to whomever it concerns such that I may receive a clear, satisfactory clarification to this situation.

Many thanks.

Regards,
Farah

Dear Farah

We no longer have any manual registration for modules. All registration has to be done through the CORS system.

Regards
XXX(Ms)
Senior Administrative Officer
Department of Psychology

Dear Ms XXX,

If that is the case, will I still be able to take the module by manually registering for it? You mentioned that that the system will not allow as such but you did not mention if I am still able to take it if registration is done manually.

I find this to be rather peculiar if this is not possible as I will be denied of the opportunity to take modules which I feel will be of great importance in my undergraduate studies as a psychology major.

I look forward and am greatly appreciative of your clarification.

Thank you.

Regards,
Farah

Dear Farah

As both module are classified under PL3284, the system will not allow you to take the other group if you have taken one group in the earlier semester.

Regards
XXX

Dear XXX,

I am a third year and am rather keen on taking PL3284_1 (Lab in health psychology) this semester. However, I am also interested in taking PL3284_2 (Clinical Application of Neuropsychology). While I understand that it is impossible to take both modules concurrently, I am wondering if I will be allowed to take the other module the following semester. Is it possible to do so? Or will I automatically be precluded from taking it next semester as both modules fall under PL3284?

I look forward to your speedy reply.

Yours sincerely,
Farah XXX

My brother the scientist.

I'm proud of my brother. He just received word that his paper has been accepted and is now published in a journal. I mean common, how many people do you know in the flesh gets their papers published in an international journal?

His paper can be found in the journal Biotechnology and Bioengineering (2006, wiley periodicals, inc.) And check out the uber cheem title...

"Crystallization of IgG1 by Mapping its Liquid-Liquid Phase Separation Curves"

Please, i have no idea what that means. Maybe i should actually read it...later.

There's something about...

Haircuts.
The way a lady feels after having her hair preened and tended to cannot be explained. There's the worry, the loss (in some cases), the satisfaction and the sudden esteem boost. If all goes well, she'll feel good about herself the whole day, even if she snipped off like only 2 inches. In any case, I chopped off half my hair (in length) and most likely 3 quarters of it (in volume) yesterday evening so my head is significantly lighter and my neck isnt aching as much. And i felt darn good lah.


Stilettos.
Heh, i just bought a pair of this pair. Pretty huh? Its funny how your posture is immediately corrected and for the first time you realise that your calves are working and not just lumps of muscles cum fats stuck to the bones connecting your feet to your knees. And the fact that you feel a little bit more confident about yourself. Heels..I like.

Chilling out with friends at a hawker centre.
It's so refreshing. Usually, i'd only go with family. But last evening, I went with ave and ade to beach rd food centre. I dont know if the other two thought the food to be good or not, but my stomach was really contented. I live on these kinds of food. Cheap and good. And i think from now on, i'll try to steer my other friends towards places like these. I think ive had enough of overpriced restaurants where the food is like not as palatable and yet 3 times its price.

Middle eastern decorations.
Im contemplating on doing my house up with in future with carpets, plush cushions, comfy sofas, paintings, ceiling drapes and chandaliers. And cool cute little teacups.

Taking photos.
Im still baffled. Why do girls get so excited when it comes to taking and having taken a photo?

Jeans.
Why is it that no matter how many pair you own, you'll only end up using the same one all the time?

Pink.
Well, there's nothing to say really :)

Themed eateries.
Billy bombers. Ive never dined there but I have this prolific urge to dress in long frilly skirts and have a ribbon in my hair, while humming "mr simon, give me a drink" should i ever.

Early preps

Spent 4 hours at tanjong katong complex shopping for my hari raya clothes like almost 3 months in advance. Amazingly, people have already begun shopping for them. I must say, the designs are getting more modern and trendy. But the price...oh the price. Worth it if you're using your outfit more than once but killer expensive like crazy if its just for that one day. In the end, after trying so many out, i came home empty handed...but im in no hurry to get one yet anyway.

Yesterday was a tad tiring. Tuition in the morn, salsa in the afternoon then swaps farewell. I guess the highlight of that was the fact i got to play the drums and i got a tour of chris's lovely house :)

Bidding starts next week. Im satisfied with the dept for blocking modules (3 of which im intending to take) in favour of yr 3s. Wohoo! :)

Also, I just feel like saying that..

I love my darling :)

Hello

I just came back from a 2D1N trip to Bintan. My sis is having her 1 wk leave and we decided to go somewhere nearby (45 mins away) instead of cameron highlands (10 hr bus ride) or bangkok (which requires flight and more planning).

Bintan is expensive, at least to me cos everything is in sing dollars and i dont feel as rich as i did in tioman where everything is in ringgit. Also, a 2D1N trip is more than sufficient before you get bored. Unless youre the type who just love tanning or whatever then you'll enjoy it very much. Then again, this is my 2nd time there so maybe im just not as excited....Bintan is just a place to go to escape the icky waters around s'pore's coast...and being 45 mins away, you can actually just take a day trip there from tanah merah terminal to take a dip and soak your feet in the fine fine sand and come back at night!

The water is very clear and yeah, you can see fishes by the shore...and that water is superbly calm. It felt like i was swimming in a lake rather than the sea! :)

Golf enthusiasts might like the course there as it is apparently in the top 100 golf courses in the world.

That aside, more bumming for me till school re-opens!

:) :) :)

Finally!

Thanks to ave, i finally have a list of halal places to dine around town besides the same usual places...

Copied this from the class blog to share so next time anyone wants to plan like an outing with muslims, you guys can suggest these places.. :) Oh yes, you can also go to the MUIS website to look at the entire list of halal food outlets in singapore.

Bumbu Restaurant @ Far East Square 63928628 ♥ Kintamani Indonesian Restaurant @ Furama Riverfront Hotel 67332081 ♥ Sofra Turkish Cafe & Restaurant @ Shaw Tower 62911433 ♥ Wang Yhingthai Restaurant @ Purvis St 63392520 ♥ Mackenzie Rex Restaurant @ Prinsep Street 63361702 ♥ Hajah Maimunah @ 11&15 Jalan Pisang 6291 3132♥ Larissa Café @ #B1-09/10 Orchard Hotel Shopping Arcade, 6734 7030♥ Mazmazza Café & Restaurant @ 67-68 Bussorah Street 6297 7472♥ Straits Kitchen @ 10 Scotts Road, Grand Hyatt Hotel 6416 7114♥ Café Vienna @ Royal Plaza on Scotts, 25 Scotts Road 6589 7799♥ Café De Laila @ 100 Orchard Road #01-03 Le Meridien Shopping Centre 6735 076

Still full closet and dusty hands have i.

Im airing my cupboard. Well, at least thats a pretty valid excuse for walking away from the mess ive made in my room.

I got rid of all the clothes i have not worn in the past 2 years and which i do not intend to wear..again. I was about to donate them to some needy indonesians cos this guy in the newspapers is acting as a middleman, collecting old clothes and stuff for the needy there. I told my grandma about it and she decided that she wanted to give them to her maid. so yeah. either way, i know my clothes arent gonna be wasted.

Amazed at how brilliantly fast I had done my wardrobe, I decided to well, do my bookshelves. The ones which were stuffed with all the mess from the exams. Threw away all my social work notes. Dont think im gonna need them anyway. Decided to keep my psych lect stuff. And my GEK1525 notes are still with me. Kenneth has asked me to pass it on. So anyone out there taking Evaluating Claims Related To Health, look me up, im giving it away. NM2219 book up for grabs too. Im still deciding if i should keep it cos its in such good condition and its a really nice read. But then again, whats the point of keeping it? Im already wondering if i should have hung onto my PL1101E text. Whats the point of keeping that? Im thinking of selling it already. I dont see myself referring to it in future considering it only somewhat scratches the surface the topics in psych.

Its funny how its so easy to keep books but so hard to figure out what the heck to do with all those tutorial readings and stuff.

I have 2 more pigeon holes to finish before moving on to my drawers and perhaps dresser. Argh.

In any case, I just completed this book by Paul Coelho. Its called "The devil and Miss Prym". I highly recommend this to everyone who wants a short hmm-ish whoa book that touches on the mumbo-jumbo about whether humans are essentially good or evil. (gosh, i can never be a book reviewer but ive never intended to be one anyway)

Im also reading another book "Why we do it: Rethinking sex and the selfish gene". Its something that delves into evolution theories and stuff. Im still struggling with the 2nd chapter. Its been a long time since i read a academic kinda book.

In the meantime, I'll be re-reading Shape :)

I think that this holiday has taught me a lot about people. The most hardworking person ends up a slob when he/she has nothing to do.

Fine, thats just me.

And crap. Im left with 1 month before school starts and look at me. I havent worked out as often as i can to lose the exam-induced fats on my body.

Dear friends

Due to certain obnoxious circumstances, I have decided to suspend my tag board. Feel free to leave your comments though yea? I figured that at least i can moderate the comments before they are published so heh, only the ones which are 'genuine' can be seen.

Finally, a way to control the spam ive been putting up with! :)

Mods

WHYYYYYYY?

I cant seem to be able to piece a nice time table together :(

Besides, bio psych, adolescent psych and lab in applied psych (of which im not even sure if lab in health psych is offered under it), i dont know what else to take if i want a 3 day week again.

Im still deciding between
1) general bio
2) management intro for breadth

and
3)org culture and power management intro
4) intro to world religion
5)understanding emotion in interactive processess
6)understanding careers
7)intro to cultural studies for UE.

PLUS im looking for breadth/UE mods that doesnt require textbooks.

ARGHHHHHHH.

But either way, i see a 4-5 day packed week looming.........arghhhhhh.

Aside: The psych camp was great..at least looking at the way the campers enjoyed it. I mean, i wasnt really around..but im gonna try my darnest to be there for the whole camp next year....besides, it might be the last in which i can be a faci. Then its time to grow up :(

Think ive got the flu bug. Darn it.

Dirty dancing: Havana nights

My gosh!! I love love LOVE this movie.

I finally rented the DVD last night. Heh, i know, the movie was out eons ago..a bit slow la heh.

I wanna dance like them too! Unfortunately, the dance in there isnt salsa. Its like a whole mesh of stuff. The cheoreographer mixed here and there and everywhere but..

(WAILS)

"I WANNA DANCE LIKE THAT!!!"

hrmph.

Still, salsa is better than nothing i guess!
First step salsa, then who knows :)

And im kinda inspired by the two lead actors. Did you know that neither of them could dance like that? They had to go through 2 months of intensive lessons before filming.

So there's hope for me!
Yay!

And the soundtrack rocks.

Lor Mee and Salsa

First, I FINALLY have a hobby ie thing-to-do-on-a-weekly-basis-during-my-hol! :) Wednesdays nights are now Salsa nights!

Next, I had my first taste of lor mee at the coffee shop at Bugis. Is it me, or does Lor Mee taste like mee rebus?

Complaints

Dear whoever.

I would like to lodge a complaint regarding the service (or lack of it) which I received on the 26th of June, 2006 at your esso kiosk along TampAve7.

I am appalled at the lack of personnel to attend to the petrol pumps at this station. I visited this kiosk at around 11pm with the intention of filling up my car tank as it was nearly empty. I waited for some time for an attendant to assist me before my father urged me to pump the car tank myself. Being a novice driver, I was reluctant and continued to desperately wait for assistance. I overhead a man over the PA system asking one of your staff to come to Pump number 1, yet no one came. I therefore decided to do it myself. I was immedietly soaked in petrol as soon as I pressed the trigger. Still, nobody came to my aid. My father, too, was sprayed.

In the end, we decided that since you did not offer us any service, we would not offer you any of our money. We ended up leaving the kiosk, paying $1.30 for the spilled petrol.

I am highly offended that the cashier aka the man over the PA system, who was well aware of our predicament, did not even apologise for the lack of service. I am even more alarmed that your company, which obviously faces a manpower shortage at this station, should not have hired more staff.

All in all, I am gravely dissatisfied with the entire experience. Unless something is done to rectify the situation, I am afraid I shall avoid this petrol kiosk.

PS: In this day and age, it is wise for a company as huge as yours to actually have an email address the public can send their responses too. Your website is superbly consumer user unfriendly. So anyway, I guess the only people who will ever come across this post will be my "readers". But never underestimate the power of information dissemination via blogs. Who knows, one day, even you might actually stumble upon this site or whatever.

For now, catharsis will suffice.

Ahh. i feel better already.

Cant believe i had to shower....AGAIN...and scrub myself hard to get rid of the pungent pertrol stench. eek.

Pet Peeves

Clerks or whoever it is that answers phone calls for a living are paid to be helpful and saccharine over the phone. Regardless of how cranky they are in person, their job is to be nice to people calling them up.

I CANNOT STAND rude, curt and arrogant persons who do not have the decent courtesy to be nice to me when Im freaking nice to them over the phone.

Whats up with you people anyway? Sheesh. You hate your job? Then quit! Nobody's asking you to pass your angst over to me on a friday morning.

And now, im affected. Sigh. Breathe in....breathe out.....

I was calling up some schools this morning to apply for register myself with them as a relief teacher. And my gosh, have i blacklisted 2 of them already. NEVER will my kid be sent to a school where the staff arent taught manners. On the other hand, some of the schools i called up were pleasantly friendly. Even if they werent as friendly, they didnt sound like im a pesty student playing a prank call on them for the umpteenth time. I mean, really, what if i were a reporter or a parent? Is that how you entertain such calls? Not even with a sincere good
morning?

RUDE RUDE RUDE.

I cant stand em. cant stand em at all.

yappings

So, i was reading the newspapers this morning when i chanced upon one of those celebrity-endorsed weight loss programmes and NO WAY. How is that earthly possible that that ex-spore idol contested loss so much weight? Sure not? Must be air-brushed...

Which led me to another product endorsed by an ex-vj student now celebrity endorsing a drink which contains probiotics. Since when does SHE have a cleavage? Rubbish lah. Ive seen her around and ive been at least less than 1 metre from her and i remember no such thing. Unless her uniform was really really baggy. NOT that i was staring at her cleavage in school or anything.

Ok, i just made myself sound like some pervert justifying her/his comments.

Anyhoos, bottom line is, you can never be too sure if someone is really you know how he/she appears to be in print cos there's ALWAYS airbrushing.

Yesterday, played badminton till my butt ached. I have loss my stamina. Ade's gonna thrash me when she gets back.

Also went to check out the new gym at tamp swimming pool. Nice. Big. People in all shapes and sizes. Comfy. There was a weighing machine there too. Shocked, am i. Shocked.

NO more chocolates for farah. Quite frankly, ive already cut down on fast food. Ive only eaten at such joints once in nearly 2 months. And ive stopped snacking. Where is the so called drastic loss in weight? Elementary farah, elementary. I havent been exercising much, thats why!

I have to curb my eating disorder too. I always always eat when i study. Its an outlet for my anxiety. Which may mean that if i keep this up, by the time i graduate, i wont be able to squeeze through my door.

And as much as people(except my dad...and mom...and sis...and bro who tells me point blank) tell me that im not fat (oh, you kind kind people) I am officially the heaviest now than ever in my life. And that is pretty depressing. Especially when you have skinny friends around you. But whatever lah. I'll just have to work something out.

I need to exercise more. If not for beauty sake, at least for my cardiovascular system and overall wellness. I dont wanna die of a heart attack. Or diabetes. Or stroke. Or high blood pressure.
Although, given my diet, race and history, it is quite probable. Everything is just a matter of time.

Enough of morbid thoughts. I am going to pick up a hobby.

Now that i am officially CCA-less, having quit the Ridge cos i was in it for the experience only and i think ive had enough of 'journalism', i need to pick something more fun...that involve me physically doing something.

My darling's picking up arabic lessons and akido. He's asked me to join him but, ur, Im thinking of dance of some nature or running or blading or smt that would make me sweat at the same time. And i'll have to do that every single week. While akido sound cool and stuff...i mean...er...i want something fun.

Any ideas? And i know i have tonnes of dance enthusiatic friends out there..so my question is, what is the best type of dance which is relatively easy to pick up and which simultaneously offers a total body workout which wouldnt too strenous to injure my sensitive lower back?

Comms Ball

Tioman trip was excellent. Ive never enjoyed myself so much. Considering this is my first trip abroad with friends, Im definitely excited at the prospects of future embarkations with my peers. Its just so different from travelling with family! And rauf, nadeem and farhana...you guys are like THE best! Did snorkelling, open water fishing, rode a 4 by 4, jungle trekking, waterfall, beach volley, and tonnes of other memorable stuff like travelling 'amazing race' style and many many other stuff that shall not be mentioned here :) In short, Im satisfied with the whole budget vacation.

Having said that, I dolled myself up one day after i returned from the island to attend najib's commissioning ball at the swiss hotel. It turned out to be like a mini dunman reunion! Quite a number of ex-dunmanites turned out to be officers and heh, the companions were from there too! :) I even met my buddy layhong! :) Such a relief cos i thought i'd be bored stiff, having to smile at people I dont know and will never remember their names but have to pretend i would. Food was much much better than the prom at Ritz. And its my first 'prom' with a date :) It feels so nice....

Oh yea, they had this studio peeps come down to take our photos and najib and me went to the place at suntec to select and order. Man, the way they made us pose...so hilarious! Anyway, here are some pics using his camera.
(deleted photo)

I honestly thought the lady doing my hair was just messing it up but after looking at this pic, i love love love the way she did my hair!

(Deleted photo)

My favourite pic of the night. Heh, yes, i made him bite the rose.

(deleted photo)
See the chain Im wearing? He gave it to me that evening.

(deleted photo)

Mini-dunman gathering! My buddy Layhong and her date. Or should it be the other way round?

How about that for a nice welcome home!

Number 52

http://ap3.fas.nus.edu.sg:8000/appl/web9/deans_list/DeansList200506s2.html

A post before I leave for Tioman tomorrow :)

Last saturday was my darling's commissioning parade. After much ado and fretting about meeting his family (his grandma, aunties, cousins, sister, parents were there cos his cousin was also graduating), I resolved that i'd pluck up my courage and meet them all at one shot. However, after all the psyching myself up and stuff, another problem came up. Ticket.

Apparently, this cohort of graduants was too large a size that tickets had to be issued to limit the number of guests each graduant invites. Blah. So farah couldnt have a tic cos his family took up all of it. So naturally, i was disappointed yet faced with mixed emotions. Its hard to explain.

But anyway, in the end, thanks to a very very very fantabulous friend, and her friend, i managed to attend the thingy! :)

(deleted photo)
The girl who made it all possible...karina!! with josh's help and his sir's help :) Really wanna thank you guys once again. :)

Here are some other pics. Heh, i couldnt recognise him and ended up taking pics of the wrong contingent until the march past... anyway, the pics are kinda small..here they are!! :)

My darling's contingent! So proud of him. I know how much he hates drills :) 6th from the right.
(deleted photo)
One of the more interesting highlights: receiving blessings from leaders of the various faiths in singapore. Check out their outfits below :)
(deleted photo)
Below: One of the cooler drills. Slow march. Kinda unexpected :) Cos they broke off into rows and to the surprise of the audience, each row went up a flight of steps right next to our seats! So i was like 10 cm from my darling who was looking oh-so-serious until i called him "baby!!" and he was trying his darnest to suppress a smile :) Told you i'd make you laugh.
There he is! The uber dark one, 5th from the front. Tsk tsk..so sun burnt.
The guys celebrating after throwing their hats and all....

Oh yeah, I got him a little surprise that night! And the next day, we set it up!

My darling's surprise belated birthday present! A fus-ball table! Im gonna beat you next time..just you see.
Arent i the coolest girlfriend on the face of the earth? :P

Alright, need to pack for my trip tmr :) I shall be back by friday! :)

Through gritted teeth

Dear Mr Boss Person,

I want my bleeping PAY. I am leaving on tuesday morning you ninkampoop and I need the moolah to travel. Why cant i collect it on Monday? Why did you ignore my sms and email? Totally bad PR you know. Sheesh. Cant believe I had to call you and ask you nicely how i can get it. But know what, it's my right!!

I have to come by when I get back? What makes you think im bloody free (fine, i maybe but still) you assuming person!

GRRRR.

As of now, you owe me $542.10. And no, I will NOT waive the 10cents.

Looks like I'll have to dig into my savings for this trip. It just doesnt feel the same using my savings instead of my earnings over the last 9 days. I mean, the only reason i took the job was to cover my expenses for this trip. Bleah. Eventually i'll get the money so okay okay...fine.

Aside: Going out with sharena. One of the rare friends i can bimbo-shop with :) It feels good to be the consumer once again.
Then heading over to nadeem's 21st bday. Hmm, i just realised that all the bday parties i went over the year were girls' parties. Wonder what a guy's 21st party wld be like.

Another many asides revolving around nudgie's commissioning ball on the 17th:

Should i dye my hair before or after i go to tioman?
Should i cut my hair?
Should i do it up or let it down for e commissioning ball?
Should i accessorise in gold or in white/silver/crystal?
Must my shoes match my bag?
And must my shoe (and therefore bag) match my jewellery?

PS: im wearing the same black dress i wore for my bday since he actually bought the dress for the 17th in the first place...

Oh fashion guru, where art thou?

Conference Call

I am speaking to 3 other people at one go and this is getting very confusing! But this is so fun! We're planning our trip over the phone and we're trying to figure out how come farhana cant seem to receive faxes and this is important cos the hotel over there is gonna send something soon. We're all fax-idiots. Hahahaa...this is so hilarious. Beeping noises everywhere! :)

I cant believe im going on a trip with friends!!! :) Im leaving for Tioman on Tues and I'll be back on Friday :)

Anyway, today is my ONE year anniversary :)

Off Day

A much needed rest day, I tell ya.

As much as I love the money, my body, in particular my legs, need a rest from all the standing. I've never felt so physically beaten in a long long time. After all, uni life is pretty much sedentary if you think about it.

This job stint has really taught me a lot so far.

1) I value my time and money now more than ever. I'm becoming especially thrifty and am not splurging money like I was previously.

2) I dont dislike primary school children as much.

3) I found out that I really do love teaching kids. While I was demonstrating how the product works, I found myself teaching the kids techniques to solve the questions

4) Working with kids enables me to test several concepts I learnt in developmental psych. Just last night, I tested a 2 year old kid on object permanence. It worked!!! I wont bother going into the explanations of the result i made..but I was left fascinated :) I mean reading about theories is one thing, but actually conducting tiny experiments and seeing it work is exhilarating.

5) I am not cut out to be a sales person as I find myself to be too ethical. I cant find it in my heart to push too many products at once cos i genuinely believe that the child has to at least try out one CD-rom first and then if it is effective, come back for more. I even made sure that the child promise to use it if his/her parents buy it for him/her. Which explains why im usually the one with the lowest sales for the day.

6) The full time staff have a lot of experience to share not only on sales, but on life itself.

7) I appreciate the value of education more than ever.

Other ramblings include....

1) I met sabrina (4A) and gracia at the bookfair. Sab's working there.

2) Met wan-tsin as well cos she's working there too.

3) Bumped into mr gan from dunman..the maths teacher.

4) Met julaina's friend. Dunno whats her name...but she came up to me and asked me if i was from swaps.

5) Met Mr Ueng last night. :) And while updating him about my classmates and when it came to norman, he said "anarchy...norman doing law...it'll be lawless". Or something like that. 5/3 ppl would be able to imagine how he said it. I guess it's the way he says things that are funny huh?

6) My supervisor (who's only 24) is kinda cute. And thanks to gracia, ive been looking at his butt. ARGH. But im getting sick of it and my darling gave me a superbly gross imagery to help me curb this horribly acquired act.

7) An ah beng colleague was vaguely being more than friendly till i realise (and thank god) that he was interested in my friend serene who was convinced that the ah beng had been interested in me. Getting to the friend to get her friend strategy. So juvenile.

In any case, im watching x-men tonight. Then its work all the way till sunday. Then FREEDOM.

:)

Java

I miss my brother.

He left for Java as part of the 35 saf medical team in the wee hours this morning. I didnt even get to say bye! I knocked off from work early yesterday evening so we could have a family dinner. So when i hooked up with the others, they updated me on his urgent trip. When I got home, he wasnt back from wherever he went. And i fell asleep.

I pray he'll be alright...and that the people of java are being helped to the max...

Oh my achy breaky body

The things i do for money....and some sporeans are downright rude. The least you can do if you're not interested in something is to say 'no thank you' and not walk on by as if you're deaf and mute when you're directly talked to. Sheesh.
(disclaimer: unless you're really deaf and mute.)

Also, i now sympathise with all full time sales people. To think they work so hard but only earn just enough to sustain themselves. Thank goodness im part-time.

Bah. Off to work, i am....

Anyone who wants to lunch with me over the next week, let me know k? Im working at the world book fair at suntec. :)

:)

Alhamdulillah!

Best results of my life!!!!

Dean's List, at long last, here i come :)

PS: That is, if i calculated right. but could it be?
Ive turned into one of those freakazoids!!!!
But I'm loving it. Every single moment of this.
Thank you Allah. Thank you.

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Why is Blake Edward's 1961 movie so called? I simply do not get it. There is only 1 scene in which Holly and Paul aka Fred appear inside Tiffany's. They did not have breakfast at the place. The merely spent the morning there for a while. So why does this little scene at the jewellery place end up being the title? Is there some cheem lit-sy thing that I'm missing? Is it because holly/lulu finds solace in that place? And it is also where indirectly, fred and holly fall in love? Any film students out there wanna explain this? (grins at adeline)

Anyway,I'm convinced that George Peppard has a contemporary look-alike. Casper van Dien. (how-do-you-spell-his-name) Right?? Its true!! The hair, those nice pretty eyes...

And is it me, or do folks in the 50s/60s speak different american english than they do today? It seems that their accents, their sentence structure all seem so foreign and a tad, well, more proper than today.
Also, i know this is quite a generalisation and i must declare that i am no film expert and that i have only watched less than 10 50s/60s film, but why are the men always either very quiet or they speak in this straight-talking somewhat monotonous tone while the women talk too fast and too much in every sentence while being superbly emotional? (And sometimes, they dont make sense..they talk about one thing but mean a totally different thing).

Gosh, its so tiring reading into what they say. I mean have you watched "A streetcar named desire". What on earth is that all about? I have to watch it more than once to get it and even then, im not sure if im getting it right!

Classics.

Day 22, i think.

I'm home. I'm going to spend the next two days at home before I start work on Friday. I have surprisingly been going out more (and spending more) than I have realised. It's time to just relax and slob.

I went for my training yesterday morning at some ulu part of singapore. I'm very pleased with myself for finding the place and arriving right on time. I think, i'm getting better at getting to new and out of the way places by myself. Its like a little adventure.

Oh, im equally proud of myself for hanging out outside all by myself while waiting for my sis to knock off from work :) It's liberating. I've learnt the art of ordering a meal and eating it very slowly to kill time. I even had time to sit down and think about my life. I highly recommend this to anyone. Just go out, take a train and alight at a place you dont usually alight or any place that you feel like it, and wonder around. It's an eye-opener. But the fun is doing it by yourself. :)

Aside: All women should be entitled to a mandatory sick-leave on the first/second day of their period.

Family Day

Yesterday, my whole family went out together.

I know it sounds so silly for me to even type that statement but in reality, its not everyday that we spend the whole day together. Try fitting the schedules of 6 adults for an entire day, taking into consideration their occupation and stuff.

So as trivial as it appears, I really relish the time i spent squeezing in our car, going to an indian restaurant at Race course road which serves one of the yummiest foods ever(plus at a reasonable price)(Aside:we cant live without indian food) and then we later went shopping. As a family.

Its crazy! Its so hard to hang out with 5 other people of similar yet dissimilar interests. I mean its different from shopping with a grp of friends cos its well, different. Family members are super frank if their bored and wanna move off. Or at least mine is. A lot of compromise was made yesterday. My poor sister had to wallow in silence, desperation glazing her eyes as she looked on eagerly at all the clothes on sale that lay in front of her. But we progressed to the electronics section of JL at Singapore shopping center. My mom's eyes lit up seeing all the home appliances. I bought her a rice cooker for her birthday. Frankly, $103 bucks (and thats after discount) a rice cooker is too much but oh well. She's convinced its better than the others. Oh ya! Today's my mommy's birthday! :)

Then we went back to the car when my bro said he wanted to go suntec. So we all went to carrefour. We spent like 5 hours there. The place is HUGE huh? And it has EVERYTHING! Bro did some shopping for my sister's birthday. Bought her blades. Then we went to the digital camera section and that's the funnest part. We had different ideas on what should replace our lost camera. Bro number one said we should just get the cheapest. Bro number 2 was eyeing the Olympus all weather camera. Sister was eyeing Canon, I was eyeing Sony, mom was eyeing only the slim ones and Dad was like "lets just think about it and buy another day". In the end, we settled on Olympus FE160. Then we went grocery shopping and today, farah woke up a happy girl cos there was cereal, cheese, bread, orange juice and milk for breakfast. (ive been eating plain bread over the last few weeks cos everyone's too busy to get stuff)
After dropping my bros off at home cos they couldnt take anymore shopping, sis and parents and me went to look at some more stuff for my sis. Then HOME.

Sunday...Day 19 of bumming

So yesterday, out of the goodness of my heart, I volunteered to help the department promote psychology to incoming freshmen right? I totally did not expect to be paid so naturally, I was excited at the prospect of adding some moolah to my thin thin almost disappearing wallet (darn tuition kid has YET to pay me). But then I found out its 10 bucks for the 8-5pm stint. I KNOW. BUT considering I wasnt expecting anything, its better than nothing. So at the end of the day, i signed the form declaring that Im about to claim the payment and stuff. I submitted the form to one of the lecturers i/c for the day.

And i just stood there waiting before i asked him "sir, so how do i go about collecting the payment"

Him: "Oh, it will be channelled to your bank account"

Me: (thinking:but i didnt give him my acc no) Looks at him blankly

Him: Office of finance will deposit the money to the account from which you pay your school fees.

Me: Oh. (walks away, baffled and feeling a tad cheated...but of course, due to cognitive dissonance, i told myself i wasnt expecting the money anyway)

SHEESH.

Last night was great. Went roller blading with two people I adore. My najib and my buddy and life-long friend farhana. :) It was so spontaneous. I met najib at 9pm. We were supposed to run but due to certain circumstances, I decided blading instead. So as we bladed along, i heard someone coming from behind, groaning (the kinda groans when you see a familiar person..ok, maybe groan is the wrong word) and tada! :) So we bladed till midnight. So cool.

Im going off to Tioman with farhana, rauf and nadeem. Haha. I know..such an unlikely group but heck! Since rauf initiated and is doing all planning i dont mind. We're gonna travel, budget-style. :) So that will be from 13-15/16/17 June.

Till then, i shall be busy busy busy working crazy hours as of this coming fri/sat.

PS: Phew, im in the clear. The minor surgery may not need to take place. Thank GOD.

Open House

Its so hot and freaking zzzzzzzzzzz. I wanna go home.
And that funky chicken song is stuck in my head.

Hmm, i suppose even though there doesnt seem to be as many freshies as last year, i suspect that we're attracting quality rather than quantity...as in the really interested ones are showing up and signing up for the camp and asking really good questions.

Darn lazy sleepy saturday afternoon man.

zzzzzzz.

HIRED! woohhoooo!

Show me the money, i say. Show me the money! :)

Coolest Aunt

My aunt returned to Norway last night. Im definitely missing her. Ive grown accustomed to the "helllloooo"s she gives me in her norwegian accent every morning. But she's happy to leave. My cousin had been sick and i guess its some maternal thing to wanna leave asap to be with her child when she's sick. She tried leaving on Sunday night and so we all hurriedly went down to the airport as airfrance promised to put her on the reservation list. She was devastated when there simply was no space.

So i brought her to the head office in anson road and the earliest possible flight she could change to was last night. And yup! So i must admit, while she was sad, i was kinda glad..i had 2 additional days with her. We went for walks to the beach, chatted etc. She's a social worker in Norway so considering I took SW1101 I roughly know what she does and she was telling me about how fast people burn out in the profession.

She's one of the closest aunts I have. Even though she lives far away, im closer to her than i am to any other aunt on my dad's side. My mom has only one sister so Im close to her, but i a different way. My norwegian aunt is cool. She works with young people i suppose because i feel like im talking to a friend. She treats me like an adult. Yet she can really have fun. On Monday, we ended up giggling a whole lot on the bus and mrt. I tell you, travelling at 10am in the morning will lead you to encounter strange singaporeans. The lady in front of us kept picking her nose, really digging at them. Gross. Another middle age lady was dressed in a beehive hairdo, thick blue eye-shadow, blood red lipstick, sarong kebaya and was, well, i mean its 10AM! And there was another character but for some reason i cant remember. My aunt was tickled.
Then there was that night when we walked to pasir ris beach. It was at that moment, that i realised that this aunt is like no other aunt :) She really knows how to live life.

She's still probably in the plane now. On her way to Paris-CDG airport, where she'll be taking another 2 flights. One to denmark and from there, to bergen. Im sure my cousins misses her. Such a pity i cant go down for my cousin's wedding. Its in August. I start school in August. Oh well. She's coming down with her husband next year for their honeymoon (i know. WHY singapore?! but i guess she wants to meet her family). I havent seen my cousin in nearly 13 years. It was always my aunt and her little sister.

Anyway, i think i may have landed myself a job. Its just a 10 day stint promoting something at the world bookfair at suntec. Im just doing this for fun. I realise im commitment phobic. I refuse to work for 3 months on end. I mean, they dont call this the vacation for nothing!

And oooooh, i may be going on a trip with my friends after all!!!! :)

day ? what day of my hols is it now?

Been out in the sun these past couple of days. I have the icky tan lines to show for it. Why do i get dark so easily? SIGH. I dont even get that bronzy sheen. Although the first 5-8 hours would leave my skin a little glowy and my cheeks rosy and my face looks like its been botoxed. Haha, but eventually, I just turn dark.

Went swimming with my mom and aunt at my dad's country club. Wah. Felt like a princess. Frolicking in the pool, swimming, jacuzzi, steam room, etc. Think i should hang out with my dad more often.
OOH! And i went to a casino and played the jackpot for the first time. I won 11 bucks but i didnt want to keep the money. Haram (sinful) money lah. SO i left without taking it. Donated to this little girl statue for the spastics childrens' assoc. Then went to the Metro sale at the expo and bought some stuff.

Hmm, ive been buying more clothes lately. Im trying to ween away from t-shirts. Actually, the only reason why i started wearing t-shirts to school since i matriculated in the first place is because i wanted to look a little less old. I wasnt really a t-shirt person before cos i used to wear my sis' clothes and considering she was studying in medicine, she had to dress by a 19 yr old's definition of 'formal' altho on hindsight it isnt so ya. Thats why farah's always wearing tshirts and jeans. BUT now that im 21, i find myself getting more comfortable not having to dress young anymore. :) Finally. I cant wait for working life. No more 'youth' pressure. And then, looking naturally matured will pay off.

Yesterday was really fun. Went blading with baby, karina, justina, josh and sharena. :) Really had a good time till that little misadventure. Poor girl.

Anyway, im gonna be late for lunch appointment...but its raining...so shiok to stay home....and zzzzzzzz...but must not be lazy...must move....must...

Eye opening

Yesterday, I volunteered to help out Pema who was helping out the European Commision for the Europe Day celebration at Berkhill Hall, Botanical Gardens.

My duties were to assist in the set up such as putting up all 25 flags of the European Union and making sure they dont topple over. I discovered a pretty neat trick. Usually, you'd think that you just stick the pole into a wooden box that overs the ground right? But did you know, that beneath the brown box, there's a plastic container which you have to fill with water so that it ensures the flags are stable? I never knew that. :)

Next, after getting soaked cos it rained like crazy, we changed into something a bit formal and we were delegated certain tasks, like either escorting the embassadors up the hill to the hall or to serve as a receptionist. Thank GOD i got the receptionist role so I dont need to huff and puff up and down while making small talk with those diplomats. What the heck do I say to them? Pema got that duty.

Yeah, my duty was kinda cool. Its so interesting to see who's who and i was lucky to be seated next to the secretary to the euro commision ambassador so she knew who's who and was kind enough to update me. Amazing how she remembers everyone. Then there were like reporters from BBC etc and a photographer from one of the supposed "high society" (like whatever..roll eyes but thats another post altogether) magazines. And I got to see what the guests were wearing and what these people actually do at parties. They stand around, sip champaigne, eat and talk while a french jazz singer did her thing.
Haha, i was expecting a scene from Decline and Fall or at least some drama, but nooo.

Oooh, the food was fantastic. I managed to taste Hungarian Beef something and some Spanish chicken dish. (im bad at names, i know)
The service from Hyatt hotel was excellent.

All in all, i had a really good time. Tiring but heck, how often do you get to meet so many ambassadors and whoevers at one go with some actually engaging in small talk with you? :) Plus, the euro commision staff were really nice to us. They insisted we sort-of mingle and get our food, drinks, and dessert (which were oh so sinful).

I so need to exercise.

Social life...finally.

This weekend kick-starts the going-out-without-a-nagging-feeling-that-i-have-some-work-to-catch-up-on phase of my holidays.

Went shopping till my legs ache on Sat. I lost the bag of clothes I just bought. Such a waste but what to do?

Had a lovely time at ave's new place tonight. Met her friends and we had fun playing taboo. Hmm, its nice meeting up with familiar friends while meeting new people once in a while.

Wonder what i should do tmr. Perhaps its time I sat down and think seriously about my life.

I mean REALLY!

Wah. Ive always thought Spore was relatively elder friendly till today.

Im freaking appalled lah. So today I took on the nice grand-daughter (and niece) role of bringing my 80 year old grandma and 60 year old auntie to the bank and the CPF building in tampines.

Ok, the bank was nice.

BUT the CPF building was a terrifying experience. The whole place was chaotic. I mean seriously! Old folks everywhere and queueing up! They shouldnt have to queue up like that! Some of them look so weak and they had to queue!!! Worse, the whole organisation was bad cos there were too MANY queues and many people didnt even know which led to where so imagine, if ME 21 years of age and so-called-educated cant even comprehend what the heck is going on, then how about the elderly??????

NO proper labelling or directions
NO proper assisstance from the people working there which therefore shows their lack of foresight in planning. Even the ones who were there werent sure or able to communicate effectively.
NO seating area for the old
NO effective dissemination of the protocol or information to these elderly. The elderly folks probably dont know that they will, undoubtedly get their workfare bonuses in due time so there is no need to queue now.
NO one answers the toll free information number.

So in the end, in the midst of all the huru-hara, i managed to get hold of a lady who could speak to my grandma the chaos. Heh, SHE wasnt as helpful either cos she read off the letter my grandma showed her. Like hello, I can do that too you know. Eventually, after my re-explaning what i wanted her to check for my grandma, she got the pic. I dont know if her response is correct but i shall wait. I took her name down in my head and well, i'll check with her in 2 weeks if my grandma hasnt received what she ought to.

And not only that! Insufficient seats at the taxi stands. The pedestrian traffic lights change from green to red too quickly. People are walking to quickly and show such impatience towards the elderly (my poor grandma!)

Wow. Amazing how you see things from a different perspective when you hang with people like 4 times your age. It's really stressful.

who am i?

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Farah!

1. The average duration of sexual intercourse for Farah is two minutes!
2. Snow White's coffin was made of Farah!
3. Owls cannot move their eyes, because their eyeballs are shaped like Farah.
4. The first Farah was made in 1853, and had no pedals.
5. Farah is the largest of Saturn's moons.
6. Farah was first discovered by Alexander the Great in India, and introduced to Europe on his return.
7. During severe windstorms, Farah may sway several feet to either side!
8. Farah can sleep with one eye open.
9. If you lace Farah from the inside to the outside, the fit will be snugger around your big toe!
10. Farah was invented in China in the eleventh century, but was only used for fireworks, never for weapons!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Najib!

1. Most bottles and jars contain at least twenty-five percent recycled Najib.
2. If you kiss Najib for one minute you will burn six or seven calories!
3. Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by Najib fighting underground.
4. Until the 1960s, Najib was not allowed to enter Disneyland.
5. In Vermont, the ratio of cows to Najib is 10:1.
6. You should always store Najib in an airtight container in the fridge!
7. Over 46,000 pieces of Najib float on every square mile of ocean.
8. Native Americans never actually ate Najib; killing such a timid prey was thought to indicate laziness!
9. There are 336 dimples on Najib!
10. The first American zoo was built in 1794, and contained only Najib!

I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

Oh ya!!

Speaking of happy thoughts...

One year ago, i met him :)

So fast, my gosh. :)

solar system

Im not the centre of the universe

Im not the sun

The world does not revolve around me.
The world does not revolve around me.
The world does not revolve around me.

I cant stand myself. Im getting moody and irritable especially at night. Then after that fiery outburst, i cry and cry because I am angry and I cannot let go of this frustration.

I know its nobody's fault.
I just wish we could all meet up, you know. Just to meet up and clear things up.
Its like im stuck in a rut.

Anyway, which brings me to the point: Im not the centre of the universe and the world does not revolve around Farah.

Gosh, all this ambiguous angsty posts is making my blog like one of those obnoxious ones in which the blogger constantly types the i-hate-the-world-or-smt-like-that kinda posts.

EEK! Im gonna post happy stuff from now on..

NO more angst.

:) Ive let go!

Day 2: Blob Deflection Begins

I kick-started my day 2 refreshed.

Badminton followed swimming :) Thanks jeannie and mel for the company!

Gosh, i feel so alive. Im not even slouching as much anymore. Swimming's good for the posture, i tell you.

I think I'm going to exercise every single morning (right..)

So anyone, ask me out if you wanna exercise or stuff.

Also, WANTED: A travel kaki. Preferably 2.

Gosh, im so pathetic. I have to beg people to travel with me. But ya. I have a budget of $500 for wherever, whenever. Drop me an sms if youre interested.
(although I highly doubt anyone would bother. everyone's got stuff to do or is sadly in need of money or their parents wont allow them to. Blah blah blah.)

So anyway, didnt really want to bring up about yest but yeah, i guess i cant push it aside. I am upset. Not past tense, present tense. I AM upset. I placed such high hopes for this and all that 'planning' we did. so when i came to the inevitable conclusion yesterday evening, i cried. Yeah. I did.

I guess things are better when theyre spontaneous.

ARGH. Im a softie.

On a happier note, tuition resumes today so YAY!I have something productive to do!

And yeah, i think, i might just start studying for next sem.

Yeah right.

Ha. ha. ha.

Day 1: The Return of the Blob

Argh.

My whole body is aching cos ive been like in bed all day. I can feel my brain degenerating already after watching hours and hours of rubbish on youtube while in bed, with my laptop burning at my skin.

I am so screwed. I have absolutely no plans for this hols. I have a nagging suspicion that my Sabah trip is gonna get canned. Even tho ive been looking forward to it since the beginning of the year. But things i look forward to always never happen so im shielding myself from too much optimism.

Its canned Farah. Move on...

Unless the 3 of you reply me soon. -_-

Anyway, aunt from Norway's around town so i might hang around with her if she wants.

Najib's gonna come out soon.

My friends are gonna finish their darn papers soon.

Im going to get a sloggi body.

HAH! Got you there didnt i?

But ya lah, i wanna exercise and stuff. Ive gotta train for something that ive always wanted to do :)

But i truly truly wanna travel. I dont wanna be a tourist. I wanna be a traveller.
(so i ripped that statement off a East Timor promotion thingy)

Really lah..im not in the mood to be all prissy in some 5 star hotel cos
1) i cant afford a 5 star hotel
2) i like the rugged grr-ish experience
3) Cant think of anthing else..see? my brain...its leaving...

And im regressing. Check this conversation out:


Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
and i love hi-5! hahahi wanna watch em in concert! hhahahah
V...A....C....A....T....I...O....N!!!!! says:
oooooh
V...A....C....A....T....I...O....N!!!!! says:
sesame street is coming to town
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
yeah!!!
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
and i wanna watch em too!
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
hahaha
V...A....C....A....T....I...O....N!!!!! says:
heheh....regressing here
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
hahah yes!
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
but heey.. cartoons/kid shows are nice..
Karina // i'm loving my God! says:
they're educational
V...A....C....A....T....I...O....N!!!!! says:

V...A....C....A....T....I...O....N!!!!! says:
indeed


Gosh. So many things to do. And not do.

So much time.

Ok people, ASK ME OUT!

PS: Kenneth, xiaowen or pema, if youre reading this and if youre free during the hols, can you fill me in on what you guys learnt in french 4? I think i may wanna sit for the..oh shoots..whats that test called?

Brain,mind or whoever's in my head, please dont leave me.

Intellectual smintellectual: Evolution

A online conversation with A. Prof John Elliot (JE):

Me: Dear Sir,

Might I just ask something which may not seem to be of relevance but is rather interesting? I remember you saying in lectures that homosexuality is something that is more and more obviously shown to be linked to biological reasons.

I was revising for another module yesterday when i chanced upon an article that challeges that homosexuality can be traces to genetics/biology. The writer argues and wonders how evolution would allow for such genes to be passed down if, from an evolutionary perspective, human beings are made to reproduce and therefore passing such genes down would not be beneficial at all...

So in that case, gender/sexual orientation is then determined by psycho/socialisation etc?

Personally, Im quite on the fence really. But it would be interesting to hear what you think about this, especially about the evolution bit...

Thanks!

JE: Its a very good question. The existence of biologically counterproductive conditions is difficult to account for within an evolutionary perspective, because they clearly do not have any reproductive survival value. Several suggestions have been made for the case of homosexuality, all of which suggest that it is an incidental consequence of some other advantages. Here are three possibilities (this is not ehxaustive):

1. homosexual people 'invest in' (help) their relatives because they do not have children of their own. families with a proportion of homosexual children may therefore end up caring for them better than those which do not. The main objection to this is that there is little evidence to support it.

2. that homosexuals tend to be more creative, and that these things are genetically linked, so that the chances of being gay increase if you are creative, but that creativity is a useful quality, it helps you invent new tools, discover new things, and generally is of value; it may also be of value in attracting mates. On this view honosexuality is an occasional side effect of creativity. It too lacks evidence, though.

3. that women who have homosexual sons are also more fertile, and espcially, have more daughters. There is evidence for this published recently in the Proceedings of the Royal Society, though I do not have the reference handy at this momnet. On this view, homosexual sons are a side effect of advantageous fertility, and the benefits (in total numbers of offspring) outweigh the costs (of some of them never having children of their own). This is the least speculative account; it accounts only for male homosexuality.

Regards

John Elliott

Me: I see. So if that is the case, homosexuals make up for their inability to contribute to continuity (reproduction) by serving some function or other.
Thanks!

JE:Not under option 3.

Me: Actually I dont quite agree that they dont serve a function with regard to point number 3.

Since they are not inclined to reproduce, and even if they did, they would be less fertile (as mentioned in your reply to Zijun), then perhaps, in some way, they serve as somewhat of a 'population control' to make up for the fact that their mothers are very fertile.

This is highly speculative on my part but could that be a possibility?

JE: Well, this suggestion does not make sense in evolutionary theory, because there is no design for the good of the species or to control populations in that theory. Evolution is not about what's good for the species, it is about the unintended consequences of differential reproductive success of individuals.

Of course, viewed from a social perspective one could say that population control was helped by the existence of homosexual individuals. But that is not their biological function, and its not why they exist, which was the original question to be answered.

JE

Me: Well, perhaps my conception of what evolution is all about requires more thinking.

I mean if we are not evolved for the good of the species then why do we have natural selection? Which correct me if im wrong, is essentially about preserving the 'good stuff' and getting rid of the non-beneficial traits.

Which was what therefore led me to pose that question in the first place. But I think I am grasping what you mean (i hope), in that in the end, it is ultimately about unintended outcomes of reproductions, which would perhaps then, serve as a platform for futher refinement in future?

In any case, thank you very much for entertaining my queries. I've always been intrigued about this topic!

JE: We ae not evolved "for" anything. We are just evolved! What you see is the result of a process of evolution, but it was undertaken with anything in mind.

Well, you can always do PL4214, if you do honours, or UAS3006 if you are a scholar.

JE

Undergrads

Yup! So I was liberated from the exams a couple hours ago....FREEEEEDOM!!!!!

:)

Watching this cartoon called Undergrads on Youtube now..you should have a look at some of the episodes if youre bored.

OOh, and while youre at it, check out this guy Anthony Callea. I think some of you might have heard me talking about how lovely his voice is. He is the runner up in Australian Idol. But if there is one song which you must hear him sing, and which is incidentally the first song i heard him singing and which heh, got me hooked is his rendition of "The Prayer". Dont watch the one which he performed in front of the queen in the church cos the sound really sucks. Check out the one where he performed on the Idol show itself.

And yes, i maintain that he has the best voice ive heard from any Idol contestant anywhere. He's like 10000 times better than any american idol. Dont even bother comparing with the local one. Heh.

YOU MUST LISTEN TO HIM!!!!!! And while youre at it, you must bear in mind that he was just a contestant while performing..and yet he exude such style and profession lah! And after that, if youre not impressed, check out the other songs he sang. He's freaking versatile! And his audition was like WHOA.
Such a nice clean, strong voice.
:)

Ahh....

Vacation...:)