Back and Cheese

Back...

From a blogging hiatus. I've tried to create new posts on at least 5 other occasions but I somehow never seem to get more than 3 sentences out before I decide to just forget it and log out. So many things to say, but macam malas lah. (like lazy lah)

From school and I need to get started on my position paper soon

Bio psych term paper. Encouraging. Encouraging indeed :) Alhamdulillah

Pain. My lower back is giving me problems again. Its getting worse by the day and I suspect I may have aggrevated it when I went for a run on sunday. Wah, I cant even get up from a chair without supporting my back like a pregnant lady. Gosh.

Cheese

Been craving for cheese. Forgot to buy the pretzel cheese thingy from the co-op so I went hunting for Combos. But NO. no where to be found. Neither of the 3 provision shop nor NTUC!
Had myself a chocolate banana crepe instead. Yummy. And Im frying cheese fries now.

Which reminds me...I better see to it that I dont burn the kitchen down.

And there's more..

27th OCT
-Gen bio assignments 5 & 6
-GEM 1008 mock test
-Bio psych tutorial qn/presentation

8th NOV
-Adol 'quiz'

10th NOV
-Gen bio assignment 7

17th NOV
-GEM position paper
-Lab in health report/presentation (70%...screams)

18th NOVE
-GEM 'test' (40%...test? TEST?! more like EXAM)

Where got time, tell me where got time?

(screams around with flailing arms.)

The Others

I have finally met the boyfriend's family. I received an invitation to break fast with them on monday and so I graciously accepted. My dad freaked out a little and delved into the "you're a girl, and you shouldnt go to a male's house unchaperoned" bit but then he relented because I had already told the bf that I would go and I had to honour my promise. Thankfully, my family was tremendouly supportive after hearing my gripes and worries about making a good impression and bla bla bla. I felt immensely comforted. I love love LOVE my family.

The dinner experience at his house wasnt as harrowing as I had expected it to be long before I actually had a boyfriend. Yes, when I was single, I did wonder what it would be like to have to visit the other side's family. I was expecting a lot of questions but I received only one or two. I was prepared to answer but no, no questions. So I followed the rule of thumb, 'dont talk unless spoken to' and I think it worked.

She was cordial to me throughout the dinner and the subsequent cake-cutting (it was his sister's psuedo birthday) and she insisted that I be in the photographs and even grabbed/hugged my arm so I couldnt run away. Hmm. Hmm indeed.

But then, all the sugar coated niceties (how do you spell it) came to an almost abrupt end...well, not exactly that, rather the sugar coat came off the niceties and then came the frankness in her. She dived into the mother-to-only son's/child-gf talk with utter seriousness that I had to stifle my laughter. Sigh. I understand where she's coming from. I honestly do. She's a practical lady and at some level, I understand her rationale for not wanting her son to date seriously. Ive actually heard her argument in some form or another from another source. My dad.

So I just smiled and nodded my head while in my head, I secretely uttered thanks to my dad and family for training me for that very day. Ive heard it before. I wasnt taken by surprise and better still, I wasnt afraid. After all, if I can survive my dad's version, I can pretty much survive anyone's :)

And so I left his place feeling nothing really. Happy? no. Depressed? No. Im just thankful that Ive formally met her and thats that.

And Ive learnt to appreciate my family more.

Terawih

I went to the masjid yesterday with Farhana for the special Terawih prayers which are held during Ramadan. Havent been there in a long long time so it was a refreshing experience :) Made a bit of slips here and there, like my telekung flew over my head as I was sujud-ing cos the fan was blowing at me. So embarassing but oh well. It was towards the end.

So many little children praying with their moms. Some of them merely emulating the positions their mothers were doing...so cute!!

Iqra-ed in the morning with Nudgie and he said I learn fast :) :) :)

Also, thanks to the MS exhibition in the arts forum on fri, I found out about MUIS' new initiative. An online platform for both muslims and non-muslims to pose ANY question on Islam. The best part is that you can ask ANYTHING and they'll be answered by scholars in the language you posted your question in. And, if your question is picked as the best one, you get an I-pod! :)

www.iask.com.sg Check it out ok? I had a great time perusing the website because FINALLY, i can get answers and I reckon you would too. :)

Kind Soul

My faith in NUS students is restored. Once again, I left my thumb drive in the CPU of one of the computers in central library in the morning while rushing to submit some form to the department. When I found this out 5 hours after I left it there, and just before I would usually lapse into panic frenzy mode (you know, when your whole body freezes and you mind goes 'oh no, how could i be so careless' incessantly?) and giving up hope of getting my new 512mb imation thumbdrive back, I decided to check out the lost and found counter.

I wasnt expecting anything since nothing turned out the last time. But TA-DA! There it was!!!! :)

Whoever who found it, I am so thankful. You are so so so so so kind :) Do unto others as you would have them do unto you :)

School's been ok so far. Progressing steadily for Lab in Applied Psych. I love my group. We're getting things done smoothly :) Now all we're waiting for is Prof Bishop's approval and then we can begin disseminating the questionnaires :)

Still moving rather slowly for bio psych but a few pages and knowing roughly whats going on for the past 2 lectures is a big moral boost.

Was starting to read Adol psych text for the first time and I realise that im in trouble. My eyes keep glazing through because everything seem intuitive and common-sensical. So then, how to mug like that? I've always found this kind of modules harder than others because you think its common-sensical but maybe its not and then how? ARGH.

But anyway, progress is progress, no matter how slow it is.

I am in a happy mood today. One of those days where Im just beaming with joy. Ahhhh...

PS: My dad's eye got scratched by a pointy plant shoot while he was transporting the pot up from the car last wed night. His eye has healed completely by now I think. Amazing how fast the body repairs itself :)

Gonna buka puasa with my nudgie tonight! :)

Role reversal

Yesterday, for Adol psych lecture, we covered 'the family', focusing on the relationship between the parents and the developing adolescent. There was this part on how the family is never stagnant, rather its dynamic. As the adol changes, the parents change as well. The relationship becomes one that is more horizontal than vertical. I like that idea. You know how top-down parents are when theyre children are still young..but gradually, it smoothens into a horizintal line..and then in some sense, vertical again, this time with the children holding on to the higher end of the line. Its a beautiful metaphor. Poignant. You realise there's a family life cycle. The young child from being dependant, slowly becomes the caregiver, before becoming dependant (perhaps in certain aspects) again.

I see this happening in my family already. The change. Its so different now. My opinion matters. My point of views hold water. My assistance is needed..and valued.
The sombre realisation that my parents are not so young anymore hit me hard this morning.
My dad was attacked by a plant last night (long story). We rushed down to the A&E and thankfully, his right cornea suffered only a superficial scratch which would heal soon. But my gosh, was i worried. I was worried that it could be internally caused. You never know if a vein/artery had ruptured and a minor stroke had happened since more often than not, people dont usually know they've suffered from a stroke/heart attack until much later. So Im really relieved.

Nevertheless, back to my point on role reversal. Essentially, had I not been there with my parents, their getting around the hospital would have been difficult. After all, in hospitals, you have to move from one waiting area to another etc, etc and you most likely have to rely on sign boards to navigate yourself. Futhermore, my dad already has his eye problem, my mom was also in a daze and her eyesight, though she tries to hide it, is deteriorating....
Im just thankful today is my free day. I want to be with my parents, my family, if when things like this happen.

You know, my parents (most parents actually) have put in so much for me, for my siblings. The least I can do is to be there for them as how they have been here for me.

Role reversal? Its nothing new, really. Its natural. The cycle of life.

What a monday Tuesday it is today.

I cant stand feeling stupid.

Yes, occasionally its liberating to act stupid since acting stupid momentarily allows you to let go the responsibility of knowing things. But to feel stupid is a different thing.
Simply because it is personally insulting.

It's enough that class starts at 8am and i have to drag myself out of bed at 530am and to school bleary eyed. But to embarrass myself at such an early hour is too much lah. Bio psych tutorial sure dampened my mood.

For those unfamiliar with Bio psych tutorials, here's a sum up. For tutorial sessions, everyone is broken up into groups. Each tutorial session is run like a 'game' show (roll eyes) where the presenting group poses a number of questions to the other groups bla bla bla. So each week, 2 chapters would be covered effciently and in a 'fun' manner. Fine. Innovative lah. Thing is, you have to read the two chaps before every tutorial or your group would end up stumped. Which is great cos then it ensures that you actually do read your text and all.

Oh come on. Who reads the textbook dutifully? I would take an average of four hours to finish one chapter! Plus, considering I havent read the previous chapters properly (which are the foundation for the subsequent chaps), understanding the current ones would be hard...and so you can see where this is heading.

I am digging myself deeper into the "oh no, what is going on?" danger pit for bio psych.

Argh. So of course i couldnt answer the bleeping questions satisfactorily. NO excuses for myself. purely my fault. Worse, none of my groupmates were prepared. So when it came to our group to answer the questions, silence silence silence.

If any of you know me well enough, i cannot stand silence. I just feel so freaking uneasy if im targeted a question and i dont say anything. I just have to say something. And so i did. Considering no one in my group wanted to say anything I had to say something.

And then the embarassment. I started babbling, obviously showing the whole wide world i wasnt prepared. I sounded purely bimbotic i hated myself. I kept thinking "oh come on farah, please dont make yourself look stupid...in front of your classmates its ok..but not your lecturer! "

SIGH.

Nevermind, in a way, i'm glad this happened because im gonna make bloody sure that im prepared for bio tuts from now on.

I need to redeem myself for myself.

ZeeeeZeeeZeeeee...DRRRRR....

My bathroom is being renovated as I type this. The drilling was remarkably tolerable till a few seconds ago. I will remain zen-like. I will remain zen-like. I will remain zen-like.

What on earth is 'zen' anyway?

I have very good news to share.

MY DADDY LIKES MY BOYFRIEND!

My Dad didnt explicitly say so but I can feel that he does. The way he remembers things about the Bf (considering that he doesnt seem to remember much about any of my other friends)..But you know what really made my day? It was when my dad said at the dinner table the evening after najib came that he's not worried about me. That I can take care of myself and I know what Im doing. (To which i beamed and then he added 'i hope so') :) You can say that pretty much all my life, Ive been waiting to hear him say that.

Yay. That dinner on friday was great. My dad got to know him more and nudgie got to see what a buka puasa session with my family is like.

I like this. I like how life (outside school) is going so far. Alhamdulillah.