Hello :)

I've been away for a while, havent I? I was settling down and getting used to the work-sleep schedule.

Work's alright I suppose. The people are nice although they're somewhat intimidating, in that they're super 'on' about work and they know so much...and they speak proper English. SIGH. So I find myself having to make a concerted effort in picking the right words and phrasing my sentences properly when talking to them. So tiring, can? Thank GOD I have cheryl to listen to my outbursts of singlish.

So I got my work area. Quite a roomy cubicle and Im issued with a new laptop. On the bright side, I'm situated near the corner of the office and so not that very many people would walk past me. Plus it isnt as cold as other parts of the building. On the downside, I cant access hotmail and other fun stuff, although there's wireless sg and computer terminals in the lobbies so I can access these sites from there.

Spent the entire week familiarising myself with the org and the job functions. Meetings, readings...and my very first report writing. It's quite scary to be doing real work. I'm just so scared Im gonna screw up. I mean, if I screw up my grades, its my problem..but this...this is different. Anyway, I guess I just need to believe in myself a bit more. I got chosen for this job for a reason. I must be in some way competent enough for them to hire me.

Collected my gown a couple of days ago. I agree with karina about how reminiscent collecting the gown was to matriculation 4 years ago. Time flies! :) Family's gonna take a picture together in our respective gowns tomorrow.

Went to the physio today. He cracked my back real good. Quite satisfying. And he thought me some exercises to activate my lower back muscles. Apparently, I've been pivoting on the upper portion of my lower back such that the lower lower ones arent really maximally used. And hurrah, I found out my physio fees could be subsidised by the org i work for! :)

After physio, I went shopping with sis. 3 tops and yet another pair of shoes...and I havent even gotten my first pay. Ah, but clothes/shoes are essential for a working lady, no?

Then, we went to see my dad perform. My dad is super cool la :)

And my darling's back! He landed about 45 mins ago safe and sound. Alhamdulillah. I actually cant quite believe he's back. He called from the airport.. but you know, he's been calling lately anyway...I think once I see him, I'll believe it. :)

Welcome home, baby! :D

END POST~12.20am

I dont know whether to feel sad or anxious. But im dreading tomorrow, thats for sure.

The next phase of life. Work.

I've become so accustomed to the bum of a life Ive had for the past couple of months. And in the larger scheme of things, for the past 4 years. The last time I had to consistently wake up 5 days in a row before sunrise was jc. From tmr? No more rolling around in bed. No more waking up and sleeping as and when i please on weekdays..all the way till Im next unemployed or retired.

And travelling all the way to b.vista? That is enough of a turn off. People say, think about the money and I'll feel better. I suppose as soon as I get my first paycheck then I'll feel motivated. Or by some amazing miracle, work is enjoyable.

How can work be enjoyable? It's work. Plus I'll have to be conscious of making a positive first impression or else suffer the rest of the year righting wrong impressions of me. So as you can tell, Im psyching myself up to have zero or negative expectations so I'll feel super happy if its otherwise.

Oh sigh. Ok ok ok. Think positive farah. I'm employed! So...

Insha-Allah, tomorrow, I will be able to start my career on a positive note. Insha-Allah, I'll have the strength and capacity to be an efficient, productive and happy worker. Insha-Allah, I'll have a positive impact on the people around me. Insha-Allah, my life will continue to be as wonderful as it is now, if not more :)

Amin.

END POST~7.50pm

Went for a walk. It hurts. My hips hurts. Every step I take, it feels like someone is stabbing me, pinching my nerves. How am I going to go to work? Or wear heels???

I guess I have to go back to taking painkillers.

Two weeks already. Ive had enough. This is depressing.

END POST~5.11pm

Atonement is depressing. Kungfu panda is funny. The Happening had to potential to be an excellent movie had it not been for the ending, or lack of it. Environmentalists would most certainly love this show.

Not much of a review eh? Oh, Ive watched almost every movie there is. I just hadnt bothered to review them because...I cant remembered what Ive seen. Lets see..Ive watched all of jane austen's movie adaptations (sense and sensibility, mansfield park, persuasion, emma, northanger abbey) except P&P since ive watched it before. Ive watched jane eyre (bronte) as well. Ive watched narnia, what stays in vegas, just like heaven, the family stone, stargate (i stopped halfway because it was awful), terminator-the sarah conner chornicles., v for vendetta, august rush, mona lisa smile, little women, sex and the city, indiana jones, never been kissed (again) ..and im pretty darn sure if you jog my memory by naming me films, I can tell you ive watched it. Well, at least 70% of the time. All I know is that I average 3 movies/day.

Hm. What else should I watch..

Oh. 2 days of freedom left and my back is aching a lot more all thanks to thursday.

END POST~12.48pm

I just watched Penelope. Entertaining and touching..such a feel good fairy-tale like movie. I havent seen a christina richie movie in ages. And I think I have found myself an actor to look out for in movies. James Mcavoy. I first saw him in Becoming Jane and now this. Incredible actor. He can change his heavily scottish accent so convincingly to suit the character he plays. And his roles...so charming la. Melt. He's not handsome or anything but his eyes...so captivating. He acted in Atonement and the last king of scotland and people have been raving about these movie. Ive been delaying watching the movie cos they seem depressing but in time I will watch it la. Oh! And he's acting in Wanted. I think i'll catch that at the cinema once b comes home (next week! :))

Im a fan of james mcavoy! :)

Yup, watch Penelope! Reese witherspoon makes a cameo in such an unlikely role :) I give this movie 5 out of 5 because I really wasnt expecting it to be that good.

PS: No kidding?! He was the fawn in narnia!
END POST~12.09pm

I broke my self-imposed home confinement twice this week. I went swimming on Tues (it felt amazing to be weightless in water. Super relaxing. Plus, I think im perfecting my backstroke :)), Bailed on a meet up with cheryl, jee and mel (sorry) on wed cos I needed to recover from tue's activity. On hindsight, maybe I ought not have gone swimming. Then today, I went for my first physio consultation. The guy is good la. Super friendly and helpful. He did a thorough assessment and concluded that I suffer an acute back pain and that the muscles are on its way to recovery, although a bit of inflammation remains and the mechanical pain may persist for 4-6 weeks. The other painful part is that it is super expensive per session. And if what farhana say is true, that usually, it would take 8 sessions, then bye bye to any gym/yoga/pilates membership for the next year or more.

Met my sis and yx there. :) I realise that most of my dear ones are working at the same place! Sis brought me around and had lunch with me. I talked to her about dying my hair cos work, yes, WORK STARTS NEXT MONDAY, and my roots are showing and all. She convinced me to go today because after all, Im out of the house, so might as well, instead of dragging myself out another day instead of resting. So I dragged myself down and ended up sitting for 5 1/2 hours. I kept wriggling in my seat cos i was hurting sitting so long. But no choice.

Anyway, the result? Im amazed. I mean, I havent seen my hair this dark in ages. I suppose its almost the color of my natural hair. I mean I loved my blond streaks but Im in for a change, so Bam! Its now brownish-black with (currently non-visible) dark red streaks. Red. Gosh. Ive always stayed clear of red cos I have this image of aunties whenever I think of reddish hair. I told this to the hairdresser who recommended the color and he promptly retorted "Auntie??? Its not the color, its the person" or smt to that effect. Ok la.

Anyway, my hip hurts from all the sitting. Im going to lie down as much as possible for the next couple of days. And apply a hot pack twice a day :)

END POST~10.19pm

I went to batam with the family over the weekend. Ok la. It was everything I expected it to be. Which was, not much. The only reason the one hour journey there is worthwhile is because of the incredible rendang which I am convinced is the best rendang Ive ever had in my life. Addictive too. Basically, food and lodging is cheap but there really isnt much to do there. Shopping isnt as good as bkk or spore especially since its now the gss. So go there for food.

And sigh, my back pain is persisting. It's nearly been 10 days so Im going to seek physiotherapy this time. It is taking too long to heal and I resent feeling disabled. How am I to sit for long periods of time when I start work next week? I cannot risk having another onset. Alhamdulillah, I can walk and all but I want to be completely cured.

I want to be healthy. I want to be able to run again. My body is aging faster than I am :(

END POST~10.03pm

I cant believe that I can access the net from my hp! It has wlan which is perfect because now, I can check my emails without having to switch my laptop or pc on. How awesome is that?

I'll also be blog from any wireless hotspots. In fact, I did create an extremely long post on the phone but I must have pressed something because before I knew it, i was logged off.

I LOVE my new SE G900. It has everything I was looking for in a phone and I've been waiting for it to come out for so long. While it looks non-descript, believe me, its functions definitely makes the phone worth every dime I paid for.It is, incidentally, the most ex phone Ive ever owned. It's like a PDA phone with a 5 megapix camera and a music player. I mean 5.0 megapix? I wont need a camera when Im out. There's word, powerpoint, adobe, excel...

:)

Anyway, I've been out of action for the last few days. Remember the back sprain I suffered from about 2 years ago? Well, it hit me again on saturday and this time, the pain was 5 times worse. It was horrible. I could hardly move. I couldnt even shift in bed without screaming. I couldnt even stand for more than 5 secs. But I'm feeling a whole lot more mobile today, Alhamdulillah. I can stand, I can walk, but I still cant sit for more than 10 mins and sneezing/hiccuping hurts a little. So, I'm still downing painkillers and anti-inflammation pills.

Because of my suay-ness, I couldnt participate in the run on sun. I was extremely disappointed. But I was in too much pain to feel sad so I got over it rather quickly. So my sis had to run by herself and Im so proud of her! It's alright. There are plenty of other runs! I was reading the papers this morning and Im still undecided which run I should take part in. But one thing's for sure, I do want to complete a 10k run by this year.

As for now, I need rest. I'm still trying to find out why the sudden sprain. Could it have been my sleeping position? Could it have been my knee- I was so focused on resting my knee that I sprained my back? Either way, I dont ever want the sprain to return. Take care of your backs everyone. It really is one of the most important muscles in your entire body.

END POST~2.06pm

test!

I watched V for vendetta (finally!) and August Rush. And the ENTIRE series of Terminator-TSCC. From 2pm-is till 6am yesterday.

WHOA. What a rush. I'll do my reviews later. Just woke up.

END POST~1.32pm

I'm usually patriotic. But not when it come to sports. Im referring to the sg-uzbek debacle on mon. Now, a huge disclaimer: I am not a fan of soccer. I do not understand the game. I do no profess to even fathom why people are obsessed about it but nevertheless, I do respect their love for the sport. But that's not the point. I found myself rooting for the uzbeks for several reasons. 1) They are rather good looking 2) I have the impression that their country is poorer than ours 3) Their players are all local players. And yet they triumphed!

With every goal they scored, my spirits soared. Spore soccer big shots need a hugemongous slap in the faces. World cup 2010 my butt. When that dunno-which person i/c predicted that years ago, my toes almost fell off laughing. Then they spent money hiring 'talents'.

Balik kampung la. I feel zero sense of attachment to a team that has so many non-sporean people. Give me a team of mats and ah bengs playing and you will see me physically at the stadium. Send the best soccer team from the inter-sch games (like vj's soccer team) and I'll be there.

Send a bunch of people who unintentionally but nevertheless exude seemingly different interests in winning and fans wouldnt bother.

And I dont buy the whole we-need-those-talent-to-up-our standards crap. Let the locals play.Fuel their passion. Granted, allow those 'talents' in the domestic league. But NOT IN THE NATIONAL TEAM. The locals need to be exposed. Do not compromise letting the locals play just for the sake of winning. Where is the authencity in winning for spore if the key players arent even sporeans? What glory? I feel nothing. I am not moved. And Im sure others arent as well.

And please. You can argue all you want about the meaning of being a national. Of course, there's a politically correct way of defining one and yadda yadda yadda. But I think the best definition is probably the tacit consensus of the 'man on the street'.

END POST~12.03pm

Day 2 of home confinement. I'm getting a bit fidgety because the weather is perfect for a run. Must. Not. Run.

And of late, I've been thinking of self-indulgences! I just feel like pampering myself. The question is, how? It used to be food. Then it was the high after each run. But now? Hm. The urge to splurge is creeping up from inside. But Im not quite sure what to splurge on.

END POST~4.50pm

Self diagnosis: I've gotten myself a lateral collateral ligament injury.

Initial treatment of an LCL injury includes ice to the area, elevation of the joint above the level of the heart, non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs), and limited physical activity until the pain and swelling subside. A hinged knee immobilizer should be used to protect the ligament as it heals. The extent of this type of injury is usually excessive stretching of the ligament causing the pain and tenderness. -http://www.umm.edu/imagepages/8839.htm

Which means, Im out of action in the next couple of days. Just in case.

END POST~2.44am