I'd just like to share the following site with everyone. Please, give it a chance and spare some of your time. View with an open mind. Open.

http://ummahfilms.blogspot.com/2007/07/its-here-ummah-films-season-2-finale.html

END POST~1.17pm

Whine. Whine. Whine.

I am screwed. screw-ed. ARGH!!!!!!!

Its friday. Friday. I have spent one whole bloody week doing nothing productive except my thesis stuff. OH MY GOSH. I have mid term papers on Monday, Tuesday and 2 papers plus an assignment due on Friday.

ALAMAK!!!!!!!!!!

Why, of all the times in the world, must I have irregular sleep patterns?

I can do this. I have time. I can salvage whats left of the week and start mugging...

Im in school now. Gonna settle some lab stuff. Then gonna start on counselling readings. MUST finish counselling readings by today.

Insya-allah.

END POST~11.30am

Evidence of real procrastination (got this from vemalan's blog) :

I AM
64%
OPTIMUS PRIME
Take the Transformers Quiz



END POST

Found out a sec school friend of mine got engaged recently. I wasnt invited. Mixed feelings about it. At first I was a bit sad and felt left out because another friend got invited and I didnt. Then I realised that I was being plain silly. For one, its an engagement, and only close friends and family are invited. Im not that close la so its understandable. I guess all we shared was a CCA. Anyway, I am happy for her :) A new phase in life. I kinda always knew she'd be the first few friends to get hitched!

Who's next? Ade? :P

PS: procratination. thou art my friend...again.
END POST~11.50am

Who am I kidding?
There's so much shit in my head.
Everyone keep telling me take things one thing at a time. How can I when everything is swarming and swirling in my head.

Thesis is time consuming. I just want to sit down and read my textbook (for other mods) dammit.

Yes, farah cannot time manage.

Bad bad bad bad bad day. I want to be optimistic but......

*Clench fists*Grit teeth*Chew tongue/gums*

END POST~8.55pm

This is insane! I came home two hours ago and Im still not showered and its nearly 1am.

Haha, remind me never to go on facebook at night. Im finally getting the hang of it. AND I just created a group! NUS Psychology. Heh. I figured that someone had to get the ball rolling...so please, if youre a psych major, join join join!

I had a really cool lab session for forensics early this evening. Fingerprinting! Heh, felt like those Csi people, dusting for fingerprints and all.

Ive also finally ended a segment of data collection so phew :) :) :) All thats left will be the lab sessions for the guys, the 2 online follow ups and lab sessions for females and Im done for data collection. Im hoping to finish the guys by end of Oct while for the females, hopefully by January next year. Meanwhile, I should be done with my lit review and methodology in Dec . Then in Feb, I'll do my data analysis and then finish writing my thesis by March. If insya-allah, my target schedule goes acc to plan, I think I can at least have 2 weeks or so to edit the final product twice or more. :) Insya- Allah.

Also, many thanks to Yunxian and Pema for helping me out over the past couple of days despite the fact that you guys are busy. I love you! :) So lucky to have you as my friend. You have no idea how much your time meant to me. HUGS. Of course to Jeannie as well..dont know if you realise it but the lift to school in the mornings has been so so so timely. I really needed them esp over the past couple of weeks.

And yes! Today I bumped into familiar faces in school. It feels so warm and fuzzy to see people I know..and people who kinda 'grew' up w me in nus. School really hasnt been the same since people started disappearing from the table. Its quite sad. Everyones too busy. But know what? I'll try to plant myself there more often. See how it goes..maybe someone just needs to initiate :) And on the plus side, now that there's not many ppl, one can actually study at the table!

Ok. Off to shower. Late. Its been a long week. Welcome, mid-sem break. (omg. so fast)

END POST~12.59am

169/200 females. 42/100 males.

Jeannie drove me to school today:) So im super early. But its okay, at least I can quickly settle stuff and head home. Im in slob wear today. Can you believe Im wearing track pants to school? Im sick of wearing heavy jeans. Heh, I wear this slacks when im going to ntuc near my house or when I gym and Im too lazy to shave my legs. Anyway, so what. People wear more slack stuff than me anyway. Ahh..so comfy. I need to get myself more of these.

Besides, I'll be holed up in the Psych Soc room stapling my questionnaires.

Yep. I came all the way to school to staple 300+ sets of questionnaires. I'm so thankful to kweeting cos she's allowed me to store nearly 4500 pages of paper in the room. Phew. I love kweeting. I'll really blanja you ice cream la k?

Speaking of kweeting, where is she...need to get the keys from her so i can start!

Oh yes, is anyone willing to be my lab-rat? I need to practice hooking up the equipment to someone and quite possibly do several dry runs. Its non-invasive, I promise. I'll probably book the labs during term break...please.......

END POST~9.40am

Why have I not blogged? I guess its always the same old things over and over again huh? My anxieties with school, yadda yadda yadda. Is that interesting? Interesting or not, who cares? Im gonna blog abt them anyway :P Haha. So redundant asking the previous question right?hee... Im in a la-di-dah kinda mood right now.

So, my research has started full swing. Over the past week Ive been obsessively checking the online research participant sign up sheet to see if Ive reached my target number of participants. As of now, I have 128 out of 200 females and an abysmal number of males..35 our of the 100 I need. Come on guys...sign up!!!

That aside, the fasting month started a 4 days ago last Thursday and I dont know why, but I feel more at peace with myself and the world. All my anxieties about dateline and thesis and stuff doesnt seem so significant when I think about the big picture. Academics is only a small part of life. And whats important is that I do my best in everything I do. The rest is truly up to Allah. I need to keep reminding myself about this. The more I let go of things I cannot control, the more I pray and submit to God, the less anxious I feel...and the more satisfied I'd feel with whatever life hits me with. After all, everything, good and bad, comes from Allah, doesnt it? :) Everything in life. Who I am today. What I have around me. Alhamdullillah.

I really need to let go and stop fussing and worrying abt the snowballed consequences of everything I do. I was talking to Najib the other day and it hit me. The reason why I feel so pressured to perform is because I dont want to let the people who entrusted me with certain responsibilities/expectations to be let down. Good and bad, I suppose. At least that drives me. One does need motivation in life.

And so, mine is : Do the best in everything you do, put in all that you can, then leave the rest to God. Whatever the results may be, always say Alhamdulillah. Never feel anger, jealousy nor pride. What matters is that having done everything you can, you should feel satisfied. :)

I need to keep reminding myself about this. But even as I type this, it seems harder than it seems.

Anyhoos, now that its fasting month, I'll also spend less time eating so that should pretty much free up my time to mug.Oooh, Im trying to factor in my new fav activity other than eating: running :) Think i'll run after breaking my fast. :)

Speaking of run, Ive put off blogging abt my shape run last sunday cos I was waiting for the pic to come out. It has but I cant seem to put pics on blogger without having it appear above my text. The run was fantastic. My first. My sis and I were running alongside each other and when we reached the finish line, we held hands :) We did it together. We trained and we ran. Yay. And and and, I'm so proud of us because we ran non-stop. Having never run 5 km prior to signing up for the run, we've come a long long way. Now, when I go jogging, I dont run below 5k anymore because its psychological la. Because its become very do-able :)

I'm thinking 10k by next year. Insya-Allah.

END POST~1.33pm

I just received this from my cousin today! Welcome to the world baby Ariel :)

END POST~12.18am

Why is it my seniors who have taken GLM think its manageable? It so difficult! YIKES.

So much admin work to do before I can start collecting my data.

AND AND AND, its Sept already! Gosh. How time flies.

END POST~8.58pm

APPROVED!!!!!!!!!!!

Ethics has approved my study! Im finally going to start on my thesis!

Wohoooooooo :) :) :)

Alhamdulillah!

END POST~11.23am

Oh yea, I was in counselling class the other day when i had this strong sudden urge to color/highlight my hair.

I'm feeling the urge again. Black, with red/purple streaks. It'll grow away by early next year when I'll dye it back to the color I have now, so it'll look 'normal' again by commencement.

Sound perfect. Someone stop me.

END POST~3.50pm

I've been somewhat putting my life on whole with regard to school stuff because Ive been hanging on to the notion that I'll miraculously get a room on campus. I think its well about time that I move on. I just received a reply from the housing people and they've already sent out the first batch of re-allocated rooms to the wait list applicants. Cue: Wheres mine?

So obviously, I didnt get la. I mean why would people apply for the wait list only to reject it once they get a room? Doesnt make sense. So, as much as I want a formal rejection letter from them so I can cleanly move on, I'm going to move on anyway.

And I'm going to make this work.

I have an inkling that the ethics com is going to get back to me very soon. After all, I received an email from him 2 days ago saying that he needed to clear things up with them..and I dont know how, but Im having a good feeling about it..
Also, he's asked me if I wanted a student helper to aid me in data analysis so I'll be able to still use the time when I have classes to conduct experiments. So cool. Of course I said yes. Any help is better than no help.

Wow. I cant believe this is going to really happen. Me, an experimenter! Insya-Allah of course, it'll get approved as soon as possible so I may begin my study....

I had my first grp presentation on tues..I guess we didnt really live up to his warp idea of 'participation' among group members. Ours was formal and hassle free. Which is ideal to us I guess. BUT, he apparently wants hassle and fumbles so he can see teamwork among the groupmates, as in, if I fumble and someone from my grp jumps in to help me out, we get higher pts. If there's a technical glitch and we all worry together, we get higher pts. What the?

Whatever la ah. Its done so Im glad. And I think we did our best! :)

Ran 5 k yest morn! Wohoo! :) Heres to a fat-fit me.

END POST~12.11pm

Im feeling annoyed right now because Im fed up with the current state of the online forum for my forensics module.

Everyone is clamouring for participation points so much so that the standards of the posts are getting lower with every post. The forum is plagued with irrelevant posts, threads with no link, and worse plain regurgitation with only the slightest hint of paraphrasing of what the previous person had already said. I'm disgusted.

Then there's evo psych forum which is so bloody cheem you wonder if these people have already read 100 books on evo psych or smt. How come the people who post stuff are so wide read and the people who reply them understand them. How come I dont? I feel so darn stupid la. Urgh. I should really post smt intelligent by the end of this week!

I really really feel so dumb ever since school started.

Boo. Yr 4 is not fun at all.

And last fri, i realise that yr 4 can be pretty lonely too. Other than your friends you hang out with, the others seem to not give a shit about you. Like they're so absorbed in trying to understand the materials themselves till they dont share or willingly share with you when you dont understand. And they're all freaking muggers.

Thats it. That IS IT. I have had enough.

Watch out! Here I come...Full speed ahead!

END POST~10.08am

Gonna sleep on the couch tonight cos my nenek's around. While I may gripe about giving my bed up to her each time she comes, when she finally arrives and I salam her and see her and when she says "I love you" in the adorable way that she does (she says it in a sing-song manner and in English), I cant help but melt. Whats my bed for a couple of nights anyway? I love my nenek. She deserves the best. And yes, I think my bed is the best one around :)

Ran 4k today. At least I ran. So im happy about that. I also finally tried fried mars bars that people have been raving about. Ok la. It just tastes like goreng pisang flour coating the mars bars. Nothing fantastic but Najib seems to like it so much that he tried making it at home himself. I know. Run then eat chocolate. So what? At least I ran.

Week 2 of school and people are so on the ball it scares me. Yr 4 is so much more diff than I expected it to be. Slackers dont seem to exist anymore. ARGH. And its wk 2 only yet I feel so guilty for not doing as much work as I ought to.

Going to sch tmr despite it being my free day cos I have a form to submit. 3 hours of travel to submit a form.

Also, I've been asked to post the following question and so Ive decided to start it as a series/segment on my blog. Heee..Its called....

Far's questions about life, the world and the universe #1
1) Why was there a long hiatus before mcdonalds brought back the milkshake to spore?
2)

Ok. There was another bugging qn on my mind but I cant remember...Stay tuned for more of Far's qns abt life, the world and the universe!!!

END POST~11.53pm

Have I mentioned I bought myself a new pair of running shoes recently? Acc Najib, popular brands like nike/addidas aren't that great. They're just popular cos well, a lot of ads go into them. Apparently, the good ones are Asics and Saucony (and maybe new balance although friends have told me NB wears quickly) And true enough, search runnersworld.com and these are the 2 brands runners recommend :)

So I bought Asics because I searched all of queenstown for saucony and only found one little shop selling it after I bought my asics. Anyway, I have to say, its not at all as pretty as the range for the other two brands but ok la, Ive come to the point where all I want is good support for my feet and durability.

And so far, I've run quite a bit! Ran the reservoir on sunday, hit the gym on tues and did 5k (first time in my life i did that non-stop and at a decent pace) and then yest I did a recovery run of 3k at a faster pace :)
I have finally found a hobby! Running :) It's actually quite fun once you've run past the first km or so..it's like your legs just gain momentum and you just wanna keep going :) Of course, having pumping music plugged to your ears helps.

I feel like running again today..or am I pushing too much? 3 days in a row? Hmm.

Strange thing though: How come when Im at the peak of my fatness, Im also sort of approaching the peak of my fitness (given if i continue with this)? So so very strange.

Aside: Why do people come up virus/worms/etc? Anybody knows how to get rid of the img1756 file that was passed on msn a last week? I think its called the IRC-Worm/Delf.CF.

GRRR...

END POST~1.54pm

Yesterday I came home at 10.45pm and I realise that maybe I should apply for a hostel after all. Especially since like Im so drained after lects alone..imagine if I have deadlines!

Yesterday also marks 2 tues in a row that Ive witness tragedy. Last Tues was the mrt accident at tamp. I saw the scdf pulling out something wrapped in white from under the train. Yes, I was one of the crowd KPOs. Then yest, about nearly 12 midnight, I was on the phone when I heard a loud screeching noise then a thud. Car accident la. As usual, cos the junction near my block has seen its fair share of collisions. No one got injured. But that's not the point. I got damn pissed off for many reasons. First, the car swerved onto the pavement and onto the patch of grass near it, knocking the fire hydrant as well as the metal rail of the staircase leading to my block. So damage to public property is. THEN, I saw from my window, the driver and the passenger running away from the scene. The male passenger came out first and then scrambled to help the woman driver (grrrr..) out. Then they ran off! I thought they were afraid of the car exploding or whatever. But when my bro rushed down to check if they were injured, he found nobody. Those two morons left their car there and they fled the scene! Is that bloody irresponsible or what? The ambulance came but nobody needed the help. Then finally, after some time, the police came. By then, I had already gone back upstairs (yes, I KPO-ed again) and my mom said a tow truck took the vehicle away at around 3 am. I mean seriously. Why the heck would you want to flee the scene? So stupid! This is spore. Your licence plate is there. You will be traced within minutes.

2 possibilities- 1) The woman has no licence. 2 ) Drunk.

Either way, I really do wonder who the heck is going to pay for the damages because I really hope it isnt the tax payer's money. Also, I wonder, will they be charged even more severely because the fled the scene.

And Im angry because there could have been someone walking on the pavement. That someone could have been me! Or worse, my mom who came back only half an hour before and gosh, thinking of that riles me! It could have even been the neighbourhood kitties! GRRRRR.. I really hope they get a fair penalty.

Alhamdulillah, no one was hurt. The accident really makes us realise that one can die anywhere. Even when you think you're safe, walking along the pavement just 2 m from your block.

May God protect us from harm/danger/accidents. Insya-Allah.

END POST~10.39pm

It's the Back-To-School post!

I had my first class of my final year today. Evolutionary psychology. A 3 hour long seminar that left me mentally drained and tummy-ly empty. I have to say, a lot of discussion went on and the questions A/p Elliot poses sure are tough. Heh, feel intellectual la. And I really like Elliot. He's really really such an adorable prof :) I nearly tripped him though. My stupid bag was in his way. So embarrasing for me cos I think I said 'oh shit' quite loud. Ah well. And he remembers me :) I guess cos I emailed him a lot abt evo psych when I was doing his dev module about a year and a half ago :) And I met him during my internship.

Wah, 3 hours only and yet I feel so tired. I dont understand. I dont think its food cos when Im at home, I dont usually feel that hungry even if I dont eat a lot, like today. I can sit for hours watching a movie or tv and I wont feel so tired. So how come sitting in a lecture and just listening is so tiring? It doesnt make sense. Najib seems to think that cos in movies, I'll be munching popcorn. Hmm. Perhaps. Then how come, when I go out and come back at night, I dont feel as tired as coming home from school at night? I dont get it! Is it all in the mind? Or are lectures just tiring cos brain work is required? Hmm.

Though my lect was at 4, I went to school for lunch with Pema in the new canteen. I dont like the new canteen. Its too open. I feel watched. Its def better in terms of cleanliness and ventilation but must they make it so open? Maybe I just dont like changes.

I got my new Nussu diary. Finally, I can get organised again. This year, we can choose between getting a blue or a pink cover so despite the fact that I was drawn to the blue one, I took the pink one, then I felt a little regret but now I feel better about it. Quite pretty la. Next time, they should just hand it to me so I dont have to choose. Ask everyone. The more choices I have, the more fickle I am.

Which reminds me, I need to decide if I really want this campus accomodation. Im having doubts.

And can someone remind me to drop clinical neuropsych asap before I get a W grade. Choy.

END POST~10.50pm

At 1900 hrs Sydney time, aka ard 5 plus nearly 6pm, I received the following sms from Farhana..

"I took a pic wif matt damon! He's in syd for ultimatum premiere. Wohoo! I got his autograph too!"

She's only been in Sydney for one month and she's lucky enough to get him! Im so jealous la! Those who know might remember that I was so in love with him after I watched Bourne Identity. Swoon.

Here's one of the pics she took with her friends and my Matt. :)

There she is, on the left, smiling like a deranged fanatic, with him :)

END POST~11.55pm

I want these songs :)

1) Big girls dont cry- Fergie
2) Wait for you-Elliot Yamin
3) It doesnt get better than this-Katy Fitzgerald

4) Memory- Bon Jovi

But mostly, I want Suddenly I see by KT Turnstall. In fact, I think Ive fallen in love with her songs :) Black Horse and the Cherry Tree is not bad either :) wohoo. haha. She is talented, man.

END POST~1.41pm